Post # 1
Anyone seem to realize that the debby downers come out during the happiest of times??? Its terrible but for me, mine is my mother. Just today she calls me to tell me that they think my grandpa is sick and might have cancer again. Then she self Diagnoses him and within 5 seconds my grandpa is extremely sick, has stage 3 cancer and probably wont make it. Then we talk about family that wont make it to the wedding. I told her it does dissapoint me that alot of my family that should care really isnt caring at all. But I go onto say how I’m sooo happy that every single one of my friends are showing up. So my mom goes on to ask me “Well do they know there wont be any alchohol?” UMMMM?!?! First of all I’m 21 and only a few of my friends will be old enough to drink and second of all, none of them are big drinkers! But she has to make me feel like they would only come to drink. And she goes on and on to say how she cant wait till this wedding is over and how messy her house is and how no one will help her clean…..and on and on. And she says we all need to clean this house because its ALL OF OUR mess. (Like I made her house messy???) I live 2 hours away! Oh grrrrr.
But honestly I’m SO happy and excited right now. I’ve been waiting for these next few weeks since september of 2008. I’m just sitting at home today relaxing and doing some last minute stuff, with the windows opens and the smell of fresh cut grass outside. If theres something I’ve learned from my debby downer mom its how not to act in times of stress. I’m just trying to be thankful for all the little moments right now. And I’m happy with that.
How do any of you deal with your debby downers?????
Post # 3
Hmm. I would give your mother a break here. She is probably stressed because of the very real possibility that your grandfather has cancer again. I would be devastated if I were in your position so I’m not quite understanding how this is a “debbie downer” situation so much as an actual, real-life crisis situation.
The fact that it is coming before your wedding is horrible timing, yes, but life happens when it happens. I think you should probably cut your mom some slack in regard to snappy comments she may be making, maybe even show some sympathy despite the fact that it may drag down your good mood. Sometimes bad things happen and they just overtake the good things. It sucks, but life sucks sometimes and we just have to deal with things as they come.
I wish your grandfather the best of health and hope that the docs can keep the cancer at bay.
Post # 4
Well see my mom is ALWAYS like this. And no one said he has cancer. Shes not very close to him and complaines about him and my dads family all the time. I am sympathetic. Very. I would do anything for him to be alright. All wedding aside.
Post # 5
Well, if they don’t know for sure the grandfather is sick yet it is being a bit pessimistic/Debbie Downer to say that he is very sick and isn’t going to make it. But still, I’m sure it is a stressful situation for your mother and try to cut her some slack.
Some people jsut like to point out the negative, and I guess your mother is one of them. She shouldn’t have said that she can’t wait until the wedding is over. I’m recently engaged, but can really empathize with your mother issues.
Post # 6
No one is being a downer about my wedding, but I’ve found myself avoiding BM C who is sooo depressed about being single and constantly crying/pity partying. Actually I’m lying I don’t avoid her, we talk all the time. But it does bother me that she is so down in the dumps 100% of the time, she has no filter.
Post # 7
Sorry your Mom’s being like that. Keep your chin up and don’t let anyone steal your joy.