Post # 1
my FI and I were talking abut babies (we would love to have a honey moon baby) our discussion turned to reveals. I definelty want to tell both our parents (my mom and his mom and dad) before everyone else. We have to skype his parents but my mom Live in the same area we do. We are going to express that this must be a very private skype so just his mom and dad no one else and my mom in our room with us. Then in some cute way we will tell them. My delemma is that both our moms have big mouths and love to post EVERYTHING on facebook. How do i express that this is a secret that I am trusting them with? And what do I do if they let slip, drop hints, or flat out tell people?
Post # 2
Blueeyedgirl212121: My thought is if you truly want it to be a secret, don’t tell them. They might not post to FB, but they will probably tell an aunt, a cousin, grandparent, etc. Or you just go into knowing they will probably let it slip to someone.
Post # 3
Blueeyedgirl212121: That’s a tough one. I totally get why you would want to tell you mom and his parents, but if you’re afraid that they’ll spill the beans you probably should hold off. I think that if you ask you mom and his parents to keep it a secret and explain to them the reasons why you don’t feel comfortable with any other people knowing, they likely will respect your wishes. Hope it all works out! 🙂
Post # 4
There’s not much else you can do except to tell them how important it is for you to be able to tell others yourself when you feel ready. Is there another close family friend/relative that you would feel comfortable with them knowing? Then they could have someone to be excited with. I told two of my aunts so that my mom could have someone other than my dad to talk to about it and be excited with.
Post # 5
I probably won’t tell them till I’m ready for the world to know. I’ll tell them all at the same time, I’ll have my Facebook announcement ready to got, and as soon as I tell them and they comprehend what I’m saying I’ll post. This is something I want to be in control Of who know when. I would be really upset of they spilled the beans and took away the fun of telling the everyone
Post # 6
I wouldn’t tell them until you’re ready to announce.
Post # 7
Blueeyedgirl212121: i actually had this discussion with DH. I had told DH that when we tell our family at 12 weeks (Christmas) I want them to keep it to themselves and DH made a good point that we cant tell people what to do with information they are given. They are excited, they are going to be grandparents (for my mom its a first).
We have decided to wait to tell our families until I am at least 12 weeks bc that way my risk for miscarriage has decreased signifcantly. I know there is always a risk but at 12 weeks, the chances are pretty slim. I plan on keeping it off FB for awhile so I will have to tell my the fsmily to keep it off FB and I dont think there js anything wrong with that.
Post # 8
Once the “Cat’s outta the bag” it’s really hard to know what will happen with the intended secret. If you have a bad gut feeling that either of the people you want to tell will blab it out – then I suggest waiting awhile so the news doesn’t spread so quickly and then if it does you anticipated that to happen. My mother and sister are sworn to secrecy until Christmas. But they can blab to eachother all they want about the babe because I have told both of them. Hope it works out for you – either way you decide.
Post # 9
Tell them that this is baby #1, and if they want to be “in the loop” early for future announcements (baby’s sex, labor, birth, future pregnancies), then they MUST keep it to themselves. If they blab, then they will not find out about future ‘special events’ until the general public knows.
Post # 10
Blueeyedgirl212121: I think that maybe you should hold off on telling them. A similar situation occurred recently and it didn’t end well. A girl I know found out she was pregnant and told her mum when she was only 5 weeks. She asked everyone to keep it a secret but her mum was so excited that she told my mum.. My mum then told me… I think many people knew about it that weren’t suppose to. Anyway when my mum told me I was shocked to find out considering 5 weeks is so early (I am currently 9 weeks and still haven’t told my mum). About a week later the girl had a miscarriage and her mum had to I untell everyone. It is an exciting time and people love to share happy news but it’s just risky to share so early if you’re not prepared to untell them if something were to go wrong.
DH and I have our first appointment next week and will be waiting to tell our parents after we have heard a heartbeat. We will be 10 weeks then and we will feel comfortable for extended family to find out at 12 weeks. Fingers crossed our parents can keep a secret for 2 weeks, however if we have the reassurance of a scan and heartbeat it won’t be such a disaster if others find out at 10 weeks too.
Post # 11
MrsAloi: I will wait till 12 weeks to tell anyone but my FI due to misscarriage stuff and I’m also a private person so 12 weekswith just me and FI knowing will be just fine wih me.
Post # 12
If you truly can’t trust them, then they don’t deserve to hear the news early on (that sounds so harsh, but I think it’s true). I’d tell them only when you’re ready for the whole world to know.
Post # 13
We told our parents and siblings around 9-10 weeks because we had the chance to tell them in person. My mom really wanted to tell her best friend, but I asked her to wait until we at least saw a heartbeat, and then not to tell anyone else. I know she wants to tell everyone she sees, but she’s been good so far. And our siblings have been good about keeping it off FB, etc, too.
I’m 12 weeks tomorrow and we’ll be telling extended family and grandparents over Thanksgiving. After that, I don’t care who knows, though I won’t make it public at work for a while.