Post # 1
I can’t believe this actually happened to me, but just shows how much my MIL really doesn’t care for me one bit. My husband and I were supposed to pick up his neice to take her to the dog park with our pups one weekend. It was a rainy miserable day, so he called his mom and said “we’ll just bring the pups by and stay for dinner”. So we show up when he said we would and the first words out of his dad’s mouth when he saw me were “You are NOT supposed to be here” I was thrown off by his remarks but brushed them off.
When we get inside I realize that they had knowingly made the one meal I can’t eat. Now I’m a picky eater, but I’ll try anything and eat a plate full of something I don’t like to be polite, but this one the one dish that even smelling it makes me physically ill. When I realized what happened I looked in horror at my husband. His mom said “well that’s what we’re eating, if you can’t even smell it then you’ll have to leave” HAVE TO LEAVE. When it was time for dinner I took the car and went to my mom’s house. There was no “oh dear, so sorry, we’ll make something else” or any apology of any kind. She said she didn’t know I would be there, but I’ve never NOT been there, in over a year and a half since we got engaged.
I was astounded that I got KICKED OUT. The worst part is that my husband was like “man, sorry babe, I’ll call you when we’re done eating.” I let it stew for a couple days and finally told him that he should have left with me. Packed a doggie bag to take for lunch later that week, but left with me. I was hurt that he just let his mom kick me out like that and didn’t even stand up for me.
Have you had any in law horror stories or times when your husband sided with his family over you?
Post # 3
kim0309 (((HUGS)))) I totally agree with you, your husband should have left with you or at least you guys could have picked you up something to eat and went back to his mom’s house! I am happy that you were able to communicate and I am happier that you kept your cool at his mom’s house because you could have been rude! So yay to you, for taking the high road!!
Post # 4
wow… I’m so sorry! That’s terrible. Your husband definitely should have said something and left with you… Guys just don’t get it sometimes. I’d have been uber ticked. That’s what would have made me the most angry!
Post # 5
Wait, why didn’t your husband leave with you? I’m so sorry your inlaws are being like that! I’m also curious about what kind of food you can’t eat? Are you allergic? Why did they think you weren’t coming – did you ask your husband?
Any time we have an issue with any of our parents, we duck away and have a private convo then whoever is the blood offspring will deliver our decision and we always act as a unit. Your husbands decision to stay and have dinner worries me a little – if they know they can manipulate the situation to get you two separated they might try it again. He can’t do that anymore.
Post # 6
wow kim0309. You poor thing! That is horrible. Have you talked with your FMIL at all? Could it be that she forgot? Perhaps there’s some way to get over any hurdles like that in the future? (Keeping a frozen pizza in their freezer for any future mishaps?)
Post # 7
Did your fiance react well when you communicated? I would be so mad over this and would of acted very unappropriately. Kudos for you for not blowing up!
Post # 8
Sorry not fiance, husband.
Post # 9
Are your in-laws aware that you can’t have this one dish? Or even smell it? Because although the way they acted about it was rude, maybe they didn’t know…? Also, making you something else really wouldn’t have helped because you still would be smelling the food they already made.
However, your husband definitely did act in a ridiculous manner. He should have left with you, and if he was so set on having that food, he could have taken some home.
Post # 10
Hugs Im sorry that happened!!! That is terrible of your in-laws to do and I agree he shouldve left with you. Since you talked about it hopefully he understands how you felt.
Post # 11
Whoa, that is RIDICULOUS! I’m sorry they were so rude to you. They have zero manners! Even if they made the meal you don’t like, they should have offered to make you something else, even if it was soemthing fast! I don’t like BBQ or half of the other “home southern cooking” meals DH’s grandma makes, but as long as I ask, she has no problem setting aside a piece of chicken for me that’s not basted in sauce or offering me something besides chicken and dumplings. I would just be so mad if they knowingly made something I hated (especially bbq, my least favorite thing) and then just expected me to leave while DH stayed behind! I mean, at least offer!
Why didn’t your hubs go with you? I think I would have just demanded that he come, too, that is way not cool. You guys need a united front; they should never treat their son’s wife like that.
Will you tell us what they made? I’m curious, but I understand if you don’t want to post what it is…i hate admitting i hate bbq and chicken and dumplings and chili =]
Post # 12
I cannot STAND shrimp. If it’s fried, I won’t eat it, but at least the smell isn’t so bad. It’s one of the Hubs favorites though. I usually just try to stay away if he’s eating shrimp or anything really fishy smelling until he brushes his teeth or eats something else to get it off his breath (he and MIL tricked me into tasting something with shrimp in it once and I seriously was fighting back gagging and it totally ruined the entire meal because I was afraid of shrimp being in something else). MIL will always be sure that there is at least one thing that has no fish or seafood in it for me when she cooks though. I just cringe knowing what you went through!
Post # 13
I’m sorry you had to be in that situation! I hope you’ve had a nice, long chat with your husband about the in law situation…and in the future–maybe only invite them over for dinner?
Post # 14
It does sound like they were purposefully trying to bother you. I hope you made your point to them and figured things out with your husband. Does he see this as a problem? Do you have a game plan for what happens next time?
Some smells bother me too, and I hate when it lingers on clothing and I can tell what a person has been around. Maybe that’s a good reason you didn’t take a doggy bag.
Post # 15
*hugs hugs* Clearly, MIL needs a swift kick in the rear-end … hrm. I hope he understood why he should have left with you – it’s just not right for his family to treat you that way and his letting you leave without any argument to them at all isn’t very supportive though I’m sure he didn’t realize that at the time …
Post # 16
That’s insane! You handled it better than I think I ever could have. I would definitely be having a talk with my hubby though.