Post # 1
Wedding wise that is. I read all these Bee’s posts, who just have their SO and their pets, planning a wedding and doing all kinds of fun, cute, sexy, romantic things together lke random car rides for a hot chocolate, picking venues together in person, food tastings etc, and I have a little twinge of sadness/jealousy becauee we are not getting much of that. Maybe not getting to enjoy fully the fun of planning our wedding because we haven’t been able to do much of it togther. Example, the ONE bridal show we went to, we had to bring the little guy…bridal expo plus 5 year old boy…Not a very enjoyable experience, for any of us. I went and scouted all teh venues, caterer etc because FI couldn’t come due to his son and no sitter (semi destination wedding) We couldn’t afford $1200 in plance tickets for us all to go. FI and I have had exactly one day of wedding planning fun stuff together, the cupcake trials.
Just curious how other mom Bee’s feel about planning a wedding with young kids. Are you missing any of the wedding experience because you’re a parent? Bear in mind I’m a step mom, so maybe different emotions, plus he’s a 5 year old boy, so he doesn’t “get” weddings lol. He thinks every weekend we go out as a family it’s a wedding LOL!
Post # 3
I have a 2 1/2 year old and I don’t feel as though he has taken anything away from the planning experience, personally. However, FI and I have a daycare which makes things a bit easier. I’m a bit worried that we won’t do so well on the day-of, but I’m still ready to be Mommy and help him to understand all of the wonderful things that are happening around him. Overall, I think have a child present for all these experiences, changes the process but doesn’t take anything away from it.
Post # 4
My FI and I have 18 month old twins and I get what you’re saying. With the babies being so young, I have them on a tight schedule. I know as do they, when they eat, snack, nap and sleep. That being said, it’s hard to get time to do many other things together, because it’s always time for “something” in the babies’ schedule. I don’t like messing with their schedule, so it’s a sacrifice I am willing to make. However, thanks to pinterest, the Fi and I can make decisions together in front of our laptop!
Post # 5
@aliavenue: We don’t have any family near us at all, and while we have babysitters, they are hard to get during the day, and none of them are we comfortable enough with to leave him with overnight, or even for a full day. I don’t feel he “takes away” from it, just that having a young child restricts us from a lot of things non-parent wedding planners get to enjoy. And I’m kindof sad about that. I certainly don’t wish him away, just wish we could have a better balance of adult time to plan our wedding.
Post # 6
My daughter is making 10 this year and I am having her in my wedding as a junior bridesmaid. I am having a blast with it all, and she has helped me play around with the centerpieces and she looks at the dresses with me. So I wouldn’t change anything.
I guess doing this and having a much younger child would be alittle different though. But it’s no different than anything else we do as moms 🙂
Post # 7
@Take The Reins: Yes, I have a 2.5 year old, and I feel this way sometimes. I also feel like vendors are always looking at me funny when I bring him along. I love him to death, but I am occasionally sad that I didn’t get to do all the wedding planning things when I was child free.
Post # 8
@jmares: That’s very true, and we are the same way, even though our son is almost 6. He has a pretty strict routine, and we try our best to stick to it religiously, becasue he is challenging to deal with otherwise. It’s much better than even last year, because we have a window now of about 45 min to an hour where we can stretch things out. Bedtime can be clsoer to 8 than 7, and he’s ok. Much past that though, and he’s a whiny bear lol! Meals he’s WAY better at because he used to be underweight and didn’t like to eat, so we’ve gotten that beat and now he will ask for food, but accept when it’s not readily available (we don’t make him wait hours or anything, but he can hold off half an hour or so without a fit, and I usually have a few snacks on me for him to keep the tiger at bay). But it’s hard sometimes, and we have done a lot of our planning online too. I was just a bit sad FI and I couldn’t experience a lot of the fun stuff together, in a relaxed, pre-wedding haze. We were always in a rush, or stressed trying to make decisions via telephone or email.
Post # 9
@les105: We got some really nasty looks at the expo by taking SS with us, and I think that was my major point of sadness. I wish in hindsight I had gone alone; FI was trying so hard to make it fun for me, but how fun is it when every vendor is trying to stuff your kid full of sugar and candy, and the kid is sticking fingers into displays, and such. I felt bad for him as much as me, because it must have been painfully boring for him! But if FI and I, or even just me alone, I think FI and I would have had a lot of fun together rather than riding herd over SS and trying to see everything as fast as possible.
I was jealous of the brides that werer there with their entourages and families laughing and being all excited about everything.
Post # 10
This was my second marriage and I had a daughter who was 7 at the time. Honestly, i thought it was super fun to include her the planning. She got to pick put her own dress and helped us pick the cupcake flavors. I didn’t really feel like i missed anything at all.
Post # 11
I don’t have kids, but my fiance works 70-80 hours/ week so I will do most of the planning myself, plus family/friemds are all in a different state so most of the shopping/crafting will be all me. Not the easiest way to do it!
Post # 12
@eeniebeans: I think an older girl would be super fun, becasue she would likely be excited and want to participate, gush and play over girly things. I remember at that age I LOVED going shopping with my mom, so a wedding would have been awesome! My aunt and uncle got married when I was about 12, and I was so sad I didn’t have a part to play.
Post # 13
I commend anyone who does things like school, work, and etc. while raising little kids. I don’t have kids yet but I know it has to get stressful.
Post # 14
i do not have kids but i am understanding what you mean..
what about all the ladies on here that have been trying to have kids for a long time, sometimes you are blessed and dont even know it. some girls on here will kill for children. me and my sister in law would be those girls.
Post # 15
I don’t have kids, but I feel like I’ve missed out on the usual steps because we’re getting married in MD but living in NY. I don’t really mind though because I see it as missing out on some of the stress! Anyway, my point is that whether it’s kids, distance, work, or whatever, there are always things that can stand in the way of wedding planning.
Post # 16
I don’t have kids but I can understand why that would be dissapointing to you. Have you talked to your fiance about it? Maybe you guys could hire a babysitter for a day and have a day together planning and having fun.