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If you're not totally opposed to any of them being there but just want to cut down on the numbers, why don't you just try inviting the parents? Just address the envelopes/invites to them. You could also say, "We have reserved (2) seats in your honor" on the response card. I guess you could then run into the problem of people who don't bring their kids getting upset when other people call you, ask if they can, presumably are told yes, and do, but -- you can't make everybody happy.
Alternatively, you could try offering babysitting services somewhere; do you have a hotel block in a certain place?
We had this problem and we are having a similar wedding (7:30 pm ceremony, cocktail reception). I made it very clear on the website rather than the invitation. Who brings children to a cocktail party at 9 pm anyway? I also did the inner/outer envelop addresses and so far, we have not had any issues with the replies.
Other than coming out and saying "no children" the clearest way is to get your point across is to not put the childrens names on the inner envelope or to just address the outer to Mr. and Mrs. It's possible some people still won't understand, but it's them that look rude, not you. Hopefully your guests will look forward to a fun night - sans kids!
I think you've received some great advice here -- make sure you check out the "related posts" at the bottom of the post ... there have been a bunch of discussions about this!
Thank you everyone.
I was thinking of doing Mr and Mrs on the envelope... I think that's the route I will go. Especially with those that have 5 kids!!
Thanks!!
Say "Adult Only Reception"
And do the " _ seats have been reserved in your name" so they get the hint that it's only for 2 people (or whatever).
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We're having a Friday night 7 pm ceremony with a cocktail and hors doerves reception to follow. We are having kids in the wedding, and I don't mind kids being there at all, but we are trying to scale down our invite list. Right now we are WAY over and we have over 75 kids on the list.
I feel like it is rude to say "No Kids" on the invite, but if none of those kids came, we'd be fine with numbers.
How many people do you think will understand that kids shouldn't come, without any suggestions? Or, is there a way to politely suggest parents find a babysitter, etc?
Please help!!!