(Closed) kids … yes this is a common theme

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
8884 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

It sucks that you don’t have room in the budget, but it’s common. I know that in the end you will have to accept whatever decision they make. But I do find it odd that they have over 3 months to find a babysitter and say they can’t find anyone.

Post # 4
Member
3050 posts
Sugar bee

@jen 42713:  yes you should respond. Just say you are sorry she will miss the wedding & hopefully you can get together to celebrate soon after. 

Post # 5
Member
8464 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

We’re not inviting kids, and we got responses like that.  We simply said that we’re sorry that they couldn’t make it and hopefully we can get together some other time.

Post # 6
Member
818 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@jen 42713:  I think a response like @mamadingdong:  said works well. Are they spending the night of the wedding or are they driving back home the same night? If staying maybe you can look in your area for a sitter for them for just during your wedding?  (They pay for the sitter of course) Just an idea…

Post # 7
Member
7992 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

If you can’t afford it then you can’t afford it. I’m sure she understands. Make it clear that it’s the cost and not the kids that you object to, and offer to celebrate with them soon. It’s all you can do! Sorry… I know it sucks… but that’s just how it goes sometimes.

Post # 8
Member
3053 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

Agreed, just tell her you’re sorry to hear she won’t be able to make it & that you’ll miss her being there. I’m expecting some of these responses myself when I put out that we’re having an adults only wedding.

Post # 9
Member
9143 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@jen 42713:  That’s how it goes when you decide not to include children; some people may not be able to attend if they cannot find (or afford) sitters.  You don’t have to say anything else other than you are sorry they won’t be able to make it to your wedding.

Post # 10
Member
951 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

It’s normal when having a ‘no kids’ policy that people will decline for that reason. You have to be accepting and gracious about their decision.

We are having infants only. My cousin has 3 kids and I don’t know what her response will be because she’s an 8 hour drive away. I would understand if she chose not to come.

Post # 12
Member
2965 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Are you trying to do an all or no kids at all wedding? I am only allowing immediate family members kids’ (our nieces and nephews) and OOT kids (which isn’t many just 2 kids) and members of the BP’s kids (just 1)… that’s only 25 total kids for us. Extended family and friends lives close and they have other relatives to watch the kids. We had to accommodate for the people who mattered the most to us.

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