Post # 1
My FMIL wants to throw me a baby shower when the time comes, (my family doesn’t know yet, wanna tell them in person) and I don’t have any friends where I live.. Who would come? FI’s sister, mom and his moms friends? It just sounds like a failure to me. Even if my mom wanted to I don’t have many female friends where she lives either..(2 hours north) And that’s where I grew up.. I moved away to another state at 19 and ditched everyone in my life.. Now that I’m back I’m not close with anyone.. I just think no baby shower is the way to go! Is that bad?
Post # 3
@ms.melli: It’s up to you and whatever you feel comfortable with. If you don’t want a standard shower, there’s nothing that says you can’t have a co-ed bbq or something so that you’ll feel more comfortable.
Post # 4
I have been a little sad thinking about this too. I seem to have lost most of my friends. We were the first to get married and buy a house (aka less money to blow) and then when we started TTC we really pulled back from the lightlife scene.
It’s very nice of you that your FMIL and family want to throw you a shower. When the time gets closer I would voice my concerns and maybe she can just do something more low key so you can celebrate and still get stuff you need, but now feel you don’t have anyone. mwitter80 had a good idea of a co-ed bbq so it’s more of a celebration with everyone you care about.
Post # 5
I’ve never had a ton of girlfriends, so my shower was mainly family members, aunts and cousins.
Post # 6
I think you should let your FMIL throw you a shower. It’s a very nice gesture and it would (hopefully) bring you two closer. Besides, you have some motnhs to go, maybe you will make some friends before that or at least be closer with your fiance’s family. I think having something low key, but nice would be the way to go. Any support/celebration should be appreciated 🙂 And not to sound greedy, but getting some things for baby wouldn’t be bad either!
Post # 7
I know just how you feel. I moved here 3.5 years ago and work so much and so far away from our house that I just really haven’t made many friends. My SIL wanted to throw a shower and I totally hesitated because I didn’t know who I would invite. The shower is supposed to be this weekend, but we’re cancelling it. I tried to invite some neighbors, some girls from work and his side of the family, but no one could come. It’s not really the greatest feeling. I had a lovely shower up by my parents, but I feel really badly for the hubs because I know he wanted to experience a baby shower and he wasn’t able to come with me to the first one. Even after all that, I still think it’s worth you giving a try though. Even if there isn’t a lot of turn-out it is good to celebrate your baby. We’re now planning on doing like a sip and see, where we’ll host a BBQ after baby comes and people can come meet the baby, that might be another option for you.
Post # 8
I’m super close with his family! It’s just a matter of who would come. You ladies all have great ideas! Thanks you!
Post # 9
My mom thru me a ‘sip n see’ in my hometown AFTER the baby is born. It was a way to let her celebrate the grandbaby (wasn’t her first) and they all got the see him. It was 95% her friends and 5% mine. Granted – I do know a lot of my mom’s friends pretty well.
I wasn’t into a shower – but to me this seemed like a great compromise 🙂
Co-ed shower/bar-b-que is also a great idea. Plus there’s no right size for a baby shower. It can be 5 people or it can be 30 people. You just plan the style around that. If it’s REALLY small maybe a nice brunch at a restuarant is a good way to ‘celebrate’ with your family.
Hope you enjoy!!
Post # 10
@ms.melli: I think it would be ok! I am having a shower for my friends but then my mom is having a shower for me with all her work friends and her older lady friends…it won’t be much FUN for me but it’ll be nice for her to show me off (this being her first grandbaby).