Post # 1
Most of these boards are bees asking for opinions on rings, dresses, and other wedding-related items. There is little to no chance that we’ll all agree on which dress or type of ring or gemstone is best. Yet, time and again I see bees disagree with a PP, and the PP gets SUPER defensive about it and hijacks the thread using it to then defend their choice of dress, gemstone, venue, etc.
1) Why can’t we just agree to disagree? If we all agreed, we’d all have the same weddings and the same lives. It’s a WONDERFUL thing to share a difference in opinion. Differences of opinion keep things interesting.
2) Someone politely disagreeing with you is NOT a personal attack. No one is judging you or berating your choice. There’s NO reason to get defensive.
3) If you’re looking for validation for a choice that is either controversial, violates ettiquette, or is totally subjective–you might be looking in the wrong place. As I said, Weddingbee has a HUGE following. It’s UNREALISTIC to assume that EVERY BEE will agree with your decision.
4) It’s rude to hijack another bee’s thread. They started it because they had a legitimate question, concern or comment. Would you want someone to hijack one of your threads? I’m guessing the answer is no.
Am I alone in this? Have any other bees noticed this? Who else feels that if we all just agreed to disagreed, the Bee would be a much better place to exchange wedding inspiration and ideas?
Post # 3
Post # 4
I’d also add, that once a question or constructive comment has been entered, not to gang up on that bee with more interrogations or negative opinions. I try to follow “think and say” or “think and not say” in those situations. I have seen people nearly bullied on here.
Try to imagine whether or not you’d be contrary or even confrontational to the person’s face. I doubt most of us would do that.
That being said, there are some very helpful and kind spirited people here. I am thankful to have a source of inspiration and camaraderie here on WeddingBee!
Post # 6
@CelticBeachBride: I do agree with you – I think any reasonable person would. Just because something is your opinion doesn’t make it right and mean anyone who disagrees with you is stupid. However, this is the internet and a public forum filled with strangers. A lot of common decency doesn’t seem to apply. Sometimes I think folks take it a bit too seriously though. I have learned to just ignore legitimate personal attacks because chances are the jerk typing it is not worth my time. There is no need to always be so defensive. A stranger is freaking out at you online? Who cares. In the grand scheme of things, it’s irrelevant.
Post # 7
@CelticBeachBride: amen honey! i have had so many of my posts hijacked lately its drving me nuts. ive had bees come down to all out bullying on me and swearing at me sending me private messages just to yell and swear at me and starting fights on my threads. its insane! im sorry but if you dont like something, please keep it to yourself!