Weddingbee boards

Hello everyone! Im new here.. although I do "lurk" around other ppls posts! I wanted to share this with all the brides out there facing tough circumstances.. My finace and I changed our ENTIRE wedding 9 Months before it was scheduled to happen and the result so far is AWESOME! We went from the traditional sit down dinner to a small luncheon.. Here is the story.

My finace and I never wanted anything too crazy.. we wanted something simple, and traditional and that reflected our personalities. As the process went on.. I looked at too much wedding porn, and got sucked into "wedding dreamland" where David Tutera (LOVE HIM) was only a wish away..we ended up at a venue that I wasnt entirely happy with and that we could hardly afford (70pp) but it included linens, waived the ceremony fee etc.. and we thought it was worth it. Total cost: $15000 roughly

7 MONTHS later...

My finace did not get the full time position promised to him at his job. Stuck at part time, he went back to school in hopes for something better to come of it. To pay for the wedding, We moved back to my mothers house and decided to postpone the honeymoon.

1 WEEK LATER

I am miserable. The wedding is too expensive and the guest list is only 80! We want a honeymoon so badly.. I begin to hate my wedding. BUT I already have EVERYTHING.. centerpieces, decor, you name it.. its in a box! I shopped early bc our wedding was in October, and all the fall stuff goes on sale at the end of summer.. so it was either shop early ad get an awesome deal or last minute. We also had a DJ and photographer booked. We knew we had to make a change, so I cancelled the reservation we had (eating $500 in the process)

I came up with all sorts of ideas as to how to remedy the situation.

1) Elope! We thought why not go off anf get married (maybe with parents and siblings only) then throw a huge party when we get back.

Downfall: No wedding party.. we are too close to them for that! I REALLY wanted them there. And we would miss out on all the traditional reception stuff. On top of that, we want to buy a house after getting married/fiance gets full time.. not exactly the best time to plan yet ANOTHER party lol.

2) Small Ceremony now, Reception later

Pros: much better budget wise, family and friends got to attend the ceremony

Cons: family and friends wanted to do SOMETHING afterwards with us, and that ate into the budget. Plus, we only had 80 ppl to begin with, and would want about 40 at the ceremony.. another party for 40 extra ppl?? HMM... we didnt think so! Although, this could work if someone wants 20 ppl at the ceremony, goes out to lunch and later has 150 at a "reception"

3) SMALL EVERYTHING

pros: cost effective, all ppl I want there, reception afterwards

cons: telling the rest of em that we got hitched without them..

TODAY...

After much deliberation (and about 3 major changes) We have arrived at the following:

An Intimate garden/luncheon/jetset wedding!!!

Ie: ceremony (1030am) ..Lunch (noon) .. off to honeymoon (3pm)!

We moved up the wedding date to June. We had not sent out save the dates or invites, so we only had to notify the members of the wedding party. My MOH's brother is a graphic artist. He designed gorgeous invitations that are boarding passes with an RSVP section that rips off just like a real plane ticket. We also created "wedding announcement" cards to send out to the ppl not invited after we get married.

All of the bridal party was SOOO supportive! Not one person complained, and actually thought we were smart to save $! I dont plan on telling another person.. they will find out with the wedding announcement! (as a side note, we have VERY small families, and most of the members are invited.. so no worries about me miffing my fav aunt or something :) ) If they ask, I will explain my finace's situation and our financial reasons.

We are having a Small morning garden wedding followed by a luncheon for 40ppl. We cancelled the DJ. The ceremony is going to be in a gorgeous park in the town I grew up in. We are hiring a guitar player to provide background/ceremony music. To surprise everyone, we are going to have our first dance right after we kiss and the butterfly release!! I can already imagine the awesome photos!! :) After pics we are heading to a lunch reception. Im going to set up a huge King table with all the centerpieces I have going down the middle. I was able to exchange all the fall colored things for Spring colors (the lady at michaels was an angel). We are going to do toasts and a cake cutting with the lunch. After a couple of hours, my finace and I are heading off to IRELAND for our DREAM HONEYMOON!! ANNNNNDDD.. we saved OVER $5000!!!!!!! can you believe that?? TOTAL cost (roughly) $9500.

Going to a small wedding was much more us. Instead to stressing about the craziness of a large wedding we saved money and are getting the honeymoon. I am able to put some of the extra $$ we saved into details that would have never happed at a large wedding. We are thrilled with the changes.

Also.. we are going out with all of our friends (including those that will not be invited) after the honeymoon to celebrate. I figure we will prepay a bar and go have an awesome time! My  mom also mentioned throwing an informal family party later!

Im sorry for the book, I hope that my personal experience helps!! GOOD LUCK!

PS: If anyone has any ideas about butterfly releases, or other things to add to the ceremony since there is really no formal reception, I would appreciate the input :)

@HappierKate:  Those are SO COOL! I didnt know you could make that.. thanks!

@globalmargaret:  I often wonder the same thing! Having done it myself! Congratulations! your plans sound great! Potlucks are always fun. : )