Post # 1
I know this question probably has been asked before but are there anyone who will have a long distance marriage? My FI will be going to graduate school for 3 years about 2.5 hours from where I live now…I have a really good job here where I live and my boss is really understanding about my situation as a single parent. I basically work the hours I want to so I can be home with my son in the mornings and afternoons most days. My FI will only be in seminary for 3 years at the most, 2.5 years at the least…Most of the time he will be home for 4 days and school 3 days….Has anyone done this before? Or Does anyone know of someone that has done this?
Post # 3
There are a lot of bees in this situation. Check out this thread:
LDR – AFTER wedding???
Post # 4
Yup, we did it! Honestly, if he will be home for 4 days and gone for 3 days….that’s not bad! you’ll be fine! That’s like a part time job, except he’ll be gone a few nights, too. Kinda like most engineer workaholics I know….=]
Post # 5
Yeah, I’m planning to study abroad for 4 months starting about half a year after the wedding. It’s gonna be really hard – but I’m sure there’ll be lots of good things, too. Like the fact that he can persue some of the interests there isn’t enough hours in the day for when I’m here as well, and like the fact that I’ll get to visit another culture and hopefully come back wiser.
Post # 6
I know LDRs are tough no matter what, but 4 days home 3 days away sounds like a dream to me! My hubby left a week after the wedding to go back to Louisiana (I’m in Colorado) and we don’t know when we’ll get to see eachother again. My guess is it will be in May, which will be 5 months since the last time I saw him…Suckyness 🙁 But no matter what, if you love someone and you want to be near them, even a day is hard!
Post # 7
Awwww that is really hard 🙁 I will only have to be away from my FI for a couple of months after the wedding which I feel will be torture, but if you love each other, I think that it will make your relationship that much stronger having him away a couple of days each week.
Post # 8
Wow I thought I was the only one! Right after we’re married, my FI may end up moving to Boston for a post-doc position while I stay in VA for a year finishing up my degree 🙁 Sadness!! I’m not very excited about the thought but I know the year will fly by because we’ll both be so busy!!! We’ve done a 2.5 year LDR before when I started grad school…but we were only 3.5 hours away. Now we’ll be MUCH further 🙁
Post # 9
hi! im not married yet, or actually even engaged ( hopefully soon) but my BFs plan and I is to be an LDR after marraige. He is in the Coast guard and i am going to medical school starting in August so there really isnt much we can do about it. i have to be in Tampa, Fl for the next 4 years and he just got stationed from Boston into Pensacola,Fl ( we are both very thankful that he is at least going to be in florida – about 7 hours away) I will have the summers/ holidays off so i will be living with him in Pensacola during this time but during the year well be LDR he will get every other weekend off so illl see him every other weekend. and right now im looking at being able to do rotations in pensacola so if all goes well after ew get married in June of next year we ill be apart for only about a year, if my rotations dont get picked where he is it will be a good 3 years we have to be apart 🙁 its good to know im not the only one in the situation
Post # 10
Well..it is comforting to know that I will not be alone in this…I love my FI so much and 4 days a week is not really that bad…I think my family understands our dillema…I have a good job here where I am at but some people want us to wait until he finishes up graduate school but I know that i just can’t wait that long…So, I figure this is just what we will have to do…
Post # 11
One of my best friends just got married in December… and in early January, her husband moved to Arizona for Army training and then might be deployed in June. She doesn’t normally let her emotions show, but she’s having a hard time with it. It hurts my heart.
Post # 12
Medicine often does this to people… so I have a number of friends who did long distance marriage for variable lengths of time. I think it is most effective when you have a definitive end date, even when it is far away.
They all say it was harder than LD engagement, but I have to say that they are so appreciative when they finally get to be together.
Post # 13
I will be doing this. Two days after the wedding, FI leaves for three weeks. One week after he leaves, I leave for a month. On month after I get back, he deploys! WHEW! That’s what the army does to you! haha
I don’t have any special advice to offer you, other than to say if it happens, you will get through it, and it will be ok. 🙂
PS. the military board is a good place for advice on LDRs, since we’ve all had to deal with it a few times. Hope this helps!
Post # 14
- Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas
We may have to do this…it all depends on what happens with my job. I’m graduating in December, and if I get a job right away, I will have to stay here while FI goes to a different city for about 3 months to do an internship. If I don’t find a job, or if he manages to find a summer internship, we’ll be able to stay together, though.
Post # 15
In the same boat. FH and I still have almost a year left in our doctoral programs at opposite sides of the country after our wedding date. Then he will (fingers crossed) get a job god-knows-where in the country while I continue on for another year still in my lonely little state teaching and dissertating. Hopefully the end date of this set-up will come sooner rather than later, but it is daunting to know that at the very least we’ve got another two years apart ahead of us. LDR’s are the suckiest of the sucky. Though we do definitely appreciate our time together more than non-LDR couples do, I think, so I guess that’s something.