LDR: Trying to understand something

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Hostess
9919 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

@AnonHoney:  When FH and I went somewhere my friends lived then yes, I wanted him to meet them.  When he was away and we were in a LDR I usually did everything I could to make sure we had as much alone time as possible.  I didn’t want to hang out with our friends – I wanted him all to myself.  I usually only got to see him for 2 days every 3 weeks, that time was precious.

If they had a lot of time together, maybe it’s weird.  If they’ve been apart for a long time and he was only around for a day or 2 I totally understand.

Is it possible she’s concerned you won’t approve?

Post # 5
Member
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

When i first dated my FI, we lived about 25 minutes apart (not LDR at all).  We did not meet eachother’s friends for that first year.  He did meet my sister and BIL after about 9 months and i met his cousin and his wife after about 6 months).  Then i moved about 370 miles away.  It was about after 18 months of dating before we started meeting eachother’s friends.  Mostly because once we were LDR, when we were together we really just wanted to spend time as just us.  I think it is normal to want to spend time alone when you don’t see each other often, especially early in the relationship.

Post # 6
Member
1894 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@AnonHoney:  maybe she isn’t ready. It took me a long time to bring my now fiancé around my friends, and even longer to have him meet family – I took time to establish that he was someone important and would be around for a long time before letting him into my circle. 

Post # 7
Member
6034 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

My Fi and I were LDR for almost 6 months before I wanted to introduce him to my friends, partially because I wanted to get to know him myself before bringing other people into the equation, partially because he’s shy and I didn’t want to overwhelm him, and partially because I wanted to be sure the relationship was actually going to go somewhere before dragging my friends into it. 

I actually wouldn’t expect a friend with a LDR to want to give up even 5 minutes of private time with her new love on their first in-person meeting.

Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors