Weddingbee boards

FI and I are marrying in a local LDS church. He is non-active and I am not a member, but it's his parents...ummm...ward? I just recently found out that we can't use candles at all and it got me wondering what other rules they have. I would love it if some LDS women on here could let me know, if they know. Especially if I need to maintain a specific level of modesty even though we aren't using the temple or anything. I was planning on a sweetheart neckline/pick-up dress and now I'm not sure if that's ok or not.

Hi there!  I'm LDS, so hopefully I can help you out a bit.  And congrats on the upcoming marriage!  How exciting!  You are right on the candles, due to the fire hazard and liability, they aren't allowed inside the church.  You can easily get around this by using those "fake" candles that are battery operated. I can give you lots of ideas, but I don't want to bore everyone by leaving a long long post. lol  So, definitely PM me if you would like some help!

As for the dress, I think it would be best if it was modest.  I know that you're not getting married in the temple, so technically you don't "have" to have a modest dress, but if you are getting married in the church, I think out of respect, it would be the nice thing to do.  I know other churches are more relaxed on this aspect, but the LDS church has always been a little bit more...what's the right word...consistent in teaching modesty.  Does that make sense? lol  If you don't want to go full on dress w/ sleeves, you could always wear a strapless dress with a bolero so that way you could remove the bolero for pics.  It's an idea.  If you want to check out dresses that you know will be modest, look at www.latterdaybride.com for an idea.  I didn't get my dress there, but I did look at their website a bazillion times for ideas!  Feel free to PM if you have any questions! :) 

@dragonfly Yea, until my FSIL mentioned it I hadn't even thought that candles would be "outlawed", but it doesn't bother me because I understand why and I wasn't really planning on having them anyway. I understand about the modesty out of respect part of it and I was totally thinking a bolero would be a great idea, but I wasn't sure if the neckline would cause problems. I guess I really need to check out that site though to get an idea. If you have ideas, by all means share, please! I have absolutely no idea what I want to do for sure at this point except that I know we're doing a candy/dessert bar haha!

@Miss Britt Thanks, I'd forgotten that Mrs. Avocado had an LDS wedding/sealing. I'll have to look through her stuff closer this time and maybe borrow a few ideas.

I'm just super happy that I don't have to pay for alcohol at all. Even though my family does drink I just kind of said that out of respect for FI's family we won't serve it and since I won't be 21 anyway, I don't care at all.

As for the dress, I think as long as you aren't showing some major cleavage, then you'll be fine!  One of the shots my photographer took showed a little bit of cleavage (and it was taken on temple grounds).  It totally cracked me up because it was just the angle of the camera, the dress was a tad bit loose, and oopies...there was a cleavage shot...All is good though! lol

My aunt & mom kind of took over the decorating of the reception and I loved the ideas they came up with.  We were on a super tight budget so they had to get a bit creative.  One thing they did for centerpieces was wrap a bunch of boxes in shiny wrapping paper to make them look like presents neatly stacked on each table.  It turned out super cute and barely cost anything.  I'm a huge fan of white lights just because they add a romantic feel to any room.  Had we had a bigger budget, I would have LOVED to invest in some market lights (they are white light strands with a bigger and rounder bulb).  Here are some links that I found when I was researching how to decorate the cultural hall at the church.  I wish I had the time/money to decorate like this, but it just wasn't happening. lol  But the cool thing is, these ladies specialize in decorating LDS cultural halls, so even though you probably won't hire them, atleast you know how pretty the gym will turn out!

Another thought is, if you are having your wedding in the summer time, or during good weather, I believe the church lets you put up a tent outside, if that's a route you wanted to take.  I always wanted to have my wedding reception outside in a big white tent with lots and lots of white lights, but getting married in the middle of the winter in Colorado kind of put a damper on that plan!  But I'm almost positive that shouldn't be a problem if you wanted to do that.  Just talk to your FI's Bishop, he'll be able to let you know!

http://cindyrellaweddings.com/ & http://www.elegantlyexpressedwedding.com/

I looked through a bunch of the dresses on there. I can't believe how affordable they are compared to most places and if I wasn't seriously paying attention to the modesty part I probably wouldn't have noticed really. I mean, except for the fact that they all have the same neckline. Since my little sis has to get a BM dress anyway, I'll most likely just tell my dad to look on there for it.

Our wedding's in Jan so that won't work, but I think due to the lack of grassy area that it wouldn't really work there. Most of the area surrounding it is parking lot if I remember correctly, but with 90+ people coming I prefer it that way. I was thinking about wearing a nice thick jacket of some sort anyway as I'm afraid I'll get too cold taking pictures outside (crossing fingers that it will snow next year!).

I was debating on using a bunch of the cheap white lights that are available every XMas for like $1 a box, because that would be a super return on investment most likely. Did you look at how much the market lights would cost? I've never seen them for sale.

Looking through those pictures reminded me how glad I am that our gym area is carpeted, so it doesn't have that gym look. At least that's what I've been told as I've never actually been inside this church at all.

I think the white lights would be a very good idea!  They are very budget friendly and you'll be able to use them over and over.  I know that Hobby Lobby starts selling them at 50% off in November.  Not to mention, Hobby Lobby usually has a 40% off coupon on their website. 

Pictures in December was SOOOO cold.  I actually totally spaced getting a "nice" jacket for picture taking.  Thankfully during the day at the temple ceremony, isn't was too bad, but I wanted to take some night pictures at this place where I live that had tons of lights...so pretty...On a whim, I grabbed a purple puff jacket I had gotten the year earlier.  It wasn't until we got to our photoshoot area that I realized that my purple jacket was PERFECT because purple was on of my wedding colors.  So, we had fun taking a few pics in my ski jacket & wedding dress.  My mom totally rolled her eyes (in a funny/laughing sort of way) when she saw the pics, by my DH and I totally get a kick out of it.

Latter Day Bride is very affordable for dresses!  I've been eyeing one of their bridesmaids dresses to wear to a my DH's formal military ball.  I think you'll be able to find a great one on there for your bridesmaids!  I too only had my sisters for bridesmaids and they are both broke students. lol  So, I knew I'd be having to pay for their dresses.  I luckily found theirs for $15 off of Christopher & Banks website.  It totally made me giggle because my sisters HATE that store b/c they think it's a "mom" store, but they loved the dresses. 

@JsDragonfly Sorry I never got back to you and I don't know if you'll see this, but I love that you got in one of your wedding colors! I've been trying to decide between a bolero and something like the faux fur cape that David's carries. That's such a great deal that you got on your sister's dresses. From what it sounds like around here, we'll probably be borrowing a large tent to set up inside and some other stuff to make it look really nice and not like a gym. I'm getting really excited because I did buy my dress and it's getting ordered. It was a strapless sweetheart cut, but I'm going to get it altered so that there won't be much in the way of cleavage at all hopefully.