Post # 1
My FI and I discussed how he would take 2 – 3 months off from work so we can adjust and get used to our new married life. Weve been doing Long distance for such a long time, so when I do come down we only have a week to get married etc. I DO need time to be with my FI– He works two full time jobs and it pisses me off to know that in the very early of our marriage life he will be to busy working so often. I know that I knew what I was getting into, but im not gonna post pone our wedding cuz of me hating his work hours.. He said hell try to get a leave of absence, but now im curious– Has anyone else done this? I know that there have to be certain reasons for this to be accepted such as sickness, military, etc– but this is a marriage which Im not sure his boss would really care for or understand– ugh Im so stressed out about this.. Any ideas?
Post # 3
We took 9 business days off for the wedding. We own our own business, so we could have taken off pretty much as much time as we wanted (within reason, obviously), but we only took off time for travelling and for our honeymoon.
I don’t think it will be easy to get months off because you got married…
Post # 4
I can’t say that I’ve ever heard of anyone taking off so long for a wedding before, but I’m sure it happens. He has two full time jobs? Does he have enough vacation at both jobs for something like this? if not, i can’t see any employer being okay with someone taking an unpaid leave for that long for a wedding.
ETA: I took off three days before the wedding due to my bachelor party and wedding prep, while DW took only the day before, and we both took off one week for the honeymoon, but I’ll be paying back that time off for about the next year since I was recently hired, and she wiped out a good portion of her vacation with hers. I don’t know of many jobs that offer too much more than a couple weeks of vacation a year.
Post # 5
Most companies will not grant a personal leave of absence without it being related to a disability or FMLA. If your hustband’s company does grant it, it will most likely be unpaid, so you will just need to be prepared to not have any income from him for the time he takes. His job is also likely not protected if he does take a personal LOA, but his company definitely doesn’t have to grant this for him at all.
Sorry I don’t have better news for you!
Post # 6
We are taking two weeks off and honestly, I think that is plenty–maybe a month tops.
Post # 7
I’ve never heard of anyone doing this.
I took 2 weeks off (1 before the wedding and 1 after) but it was all paid vacation time that I had earned.
Post # 8
Honestly, I think most employers would be ticked off by this. I get why you’d want to do it, but usually a leave of absence comes after a traumatic experience (births, deaths, illnesses). Good luck!
Post # 9
He wouldn’t qualify for FMLA, depending on his company, he could request a personal leave of absence. But, I can’t see an employer approving that for 2 months for getting married….can he talk to his employer about taking a couple of weeks off??
Post # 10
I don’t see how any company would let him take a paid leave of absence for getting married. Three weeks vacation is the max anyone in our industry does.
Post # 11
I know that many do just take 2 weeks off– but I just havent seen my FI in over a year– and even the year before that, we barely saw each other, so I feel like I want MORE time with him. lol..his current plan is to take 4 weeks off– 2 weeks regular vacation time he gets plus 2 weeks etc [ unpaid- his ” allowed” to be absent days ” ]
1 week of that will be used up a week before the wedding – so in total we got just 3 weeks. 🙁
Post # 12
I think months off from work would be downright boring! I understand that you both want your time together to enjoy new married life but most peoples newly married life does involve there jobs and working each day. I plan to take off two weeks for my wedding and that is enough time for me… but to each is own!
Post # 13
@Mrsgurzakovic: I think 3 weeks is more than enough time to settle in to your lives together, espcially if you are both not working for that time! 🙂
Post # 14
Does using all his “allowed to be absent” days prohibit him from having any more for the rest of the year? What about if he needs those days for emergencies where you truly need him to be there for you, etc – would his job allow those on top of taking off so much time?
Post # 15
Could you maybe take one day off a week (like a Friday) where you both spend meaningful time together or go on trips. That way, you spread it out and it will last longer (the entire year, if you do 14 days worth).
Post # 16
Under FMLA, you can be granted up to 12 weeks unpaid leave in certain situations, with guarantee that the company will take you back into your previous or a similar role. I don’t think that this would qualify for FMLA, and I would be concerned that if your FI was granted a leave of absence, that his position would not be protected and that he would be laid off or replaced during his leave.
Labor laws are very specific – he needs to speak with an HR rep from each company immediately to see what his options are. Is he full-time in both of these positions? Is he eligible for benefits with both? There’s a lot that needs to be consisered for his career, your financial obligations, benefits coverage, and more. Honestly, I think that a couple of weeks vacation would be realistic to expect.