(Closed) Legally married before the big party? I need your help!!

posted 6 years ago in Ceremony
  • poll: Should I still have a bridal party if we are getting legally married first?
    yes, who cares : (24 votes)
    89 %
    Don't do it, call your bridal party and let them off easily : (3 votes)
    11 %
  • Post # 3
    1365 posts
    Bumble bee

    I would have the big party sooner, if I were you.

    But either way, have the bridal party – it is still your wedding, this next week is just legal stuff!

    Post # 5
    321 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    This is what we did–only we had to wait longer because we wanted a specific date! NO big.

    Post # 6
    434 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    We got legally married about 3 or 4 weeks before our “wedding” and most of our guests didn’t even know. We had a very simple JOP ceremony in our house (with our parents as witnesses) to get the legal stuff done, then had our big Destination Wedding in Jamaica with the dresses and the bridesmaids and the flower and all that jazz later that month. We didn’t hide that we got married first, but we didn’t advertise it either. I’m not even sure all my BM’s knew we were legally married at home before the wedding!

    Post # 7
    1089 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    You don’t have to do the ceremony in a curch or anything. You can do one in the hall/ which ever venue the party is at.  You can do basically a vow renual. That is if you still want to do a little ceremony.

    If they already forked out the cash for the dresses then I would definitely do something like that. If one of my friends got me to buy a dress for their wedding and then canceled I wouldn’t be too happy…

    Post # 8
    4663 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    im exactly in that boat. we are getting married legally dec 1/11 but our “party” is dec 1/12. but ours is a secret. nobody will know we are actually married. i think it would ruin things for the “real” ceremony.

    Post # 9
    201 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    my fiance suggested we got married now and still have the ceremony. but it seems to be it would kind of “ruin” the whole ceremony excitement. I know for one i wouldnt be able to keep quite about being his wife i will want everyone to know! so i feel if we were to do that people will not come to the ceremony we may as well just have a big party instead! so i feel where youre coming from! sounds like youre like me and by sep youre not going to really wanna do a real wedding.decisions decisions!

    Post # 10
    1542 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    You can have the bridal party for pictures and they will still feel a part of your day which is the important part of it, I say do it.

    Post # 11
    39 posts
    • Wedding: September 2012

    i did the same as you!! my hubby (omg, first time seeing that in PRINT!) and i just got married this past Friday – city hall ceremony with our parents and his best friend as our witness, and photographers of course to capture the moment. we also live-streamed the whole ceremony via my iphone to my best friends (who would’ve been my MOHs) over on the west coast! it was great – whats not to love about having TWO weddings especially when its with the ONE guy you LOVE? we got to have our low-key city wedding and next year (also Sept) we will have our big party blowout πŸ™‚ 

    Plus, now I will get to have worn two beautiful white dresses… even though this one was just a simple cocktail dress, but with a kooky headpiece!

    We told our close friends, but not everyone we know, obviously our families know, and next year we still plan on doing the whole walking down the aisle, bridesmaids and groomsmen thing… I’m sure we will feel just as special on that day! go for it!

    Post # 13
    5657 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2012

    We have to get legally married a few days before our wedding because our pastor cannot marry us in Quebec (We live in Ontario).

    I think you can definitely still have a bridal party and a nice party!

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