Post # 1
My invites went out and were received yesterday.
There are no kids invited, except FI and my siblings kids.
I addressed the invites: Mr. and Mrs. John Smith… I then had a line on the RSVP card that said ____ seats reserved in your honor. I filled in a 2 for the couples.
My sister just called me saying that a 2nd cousin called wasn’t sure if his daughter was invited. Really?! Then, she proceeds to tell me that he asked if kids were going to be there – and, get this, SHE SAID YES.
I almost loped off her head. I guess I should have handled it better.
I told her – NO – kids are NOT invited. The only kids invited are our siblings. And she said – oh… like she was going to tell me that I should rethink this kid (his daughter is my god-daughter – trust me, I’ve THOUGHT about it – I actually would want her there – but it’s not fair to the FI’s cousins kids he wants there).
Anyway… all that to say… the offending season has officially opened for me!
Post # 3
Buckle up! There’s no escaping it 🙂
Post # 4
oracle. I’m going to have the same problem. I would be very diplomatic and I would call your second cousin. Tell him/her the reasons why you are not inviting other children but you would love to see (invited people) there. Then, if it’s a destination wedding or something of the like, mention any sitting services you have thought of or considered for the day so the parents can go and have fun and not have to hunt for someone to watch their child.
We’re only inviting my Fi’s sister’s kids. But we’re offering sitter services (not paying for them.) Just helping them find them.
Good luck. I’m thinking of you!!! 🙂
Post # 5
I am seriously thinking about having a no Kid wedding because after 150 guest I have to pay 70 per person whether they are 5 or 50.
I know I am going to offend some people and I am really scared but (the brat comes out) its my wedding we are paying for it and i dont want a bunch of kids running around like crazy bananas!!!
Post # 6
I really cant wait for people to ask me if their kids are invited! I will ask was their name on the invite?
Post # 7
Aw man, I feel your pain! I also have a 2nd cousin trying to force us to invite her kids! It’s like heeellloooo, those would be our 3rd cousins my God where does it end?? She told my mom that if she can’t bring her kids then her mom, who is my 1st cousin & who I actually want there, would have to watch them & wouldn’t be able to come. Ahhh, don’t you just love family? They are so very considerate!
Post # 8
Ouch, that’s rough. I kind of know what you’re going through – we are not inviting cousins, however, one of FH’s cousins IS his god-daughter. So, we made the exception for her and her husband (and their child). I think, where this child is your god-daughter, others would not be offended if you allowed her there.
Post # 9
OH! For those of you considering it. Oracle did it by inserting the number of invitees who would attend. I wrote the names of the invitees on the inner envelope – yes, we did inner envelopes. Outside was Mr and Mrs John Smith. Inside was John and Sarah. I figure they’ll get the drift. If you get an RSVP back with more than the invited amount, CALL THEM and discuss it and explain your reasons. My reason? Our chapel only holds 80ppl!! Plus, the cost. 🙂
Post # 10
I’m going to have the same problem but with family members. My FI’s family is huge! and I just don’t feel comfortable inviting a 4th cousin that I have never met and lives in a different country.
Post # 11
Best of luck!
One of FI’s cousins declined attending our wedding and included a note that said that their children were their “indebted blessings” that they could not be away from for even one night. They also mentioned that “when we have children we will behold the true meaning of life.” All you can do is laugh it off and hold your ground. It’s your wedding, not anyone elses!
Post # 13
@jaylii9: Lol, I remember that story. Those people were a trip. You’ve got the perfect attitude towards it. I wish I had laughed off more things while I was planning. Hindsight’s 20/20 and all that…
Post # 14
@jaylii9: Wow! That’s insane!
I say its your darn wedding do what you want. If they have a problem then they can decline. It drives me nuts that people think you are obligated to invite their children. Why can’t people just understand and get a sitter. Ugh so annoying. I got lucky but I feel bad for those of you who have to go through this!
Post # 15
I’m having a no-kids wedding as well and the drama is only just beginning for me too.
Don’t you just love how people turn into crazy psychos when it comes to these things? It’s nuts…
Post # 16
@Edina: Yeah, I was upset at first and my FI asked me “what does indebted blessing even mean?!” We just looked at each other and started laughing. I wish I could be less uptight about certain aspects of wedding planning as well though!