(Closed) Letting your dad down

posted 8 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
573 posts
Busy bee

What if you have both of them walk you down the aisle? Or you could have your son walk in front of you while your dad is next to you.

Post # 4
Hostess
16217 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I agree that maybe they could both do it? Sounds like it’s important to your dad.

If that’s not an option, is there another way you could honor him?

Post # 5
Member
937 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

My Dad would be truly devastated if I chose anyone other than him to walk me down the aisle. Is there any particular reason why you’re having your son do it instead of your Dad?

Post # 6
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Have both and you in between!!   What could be better?

Post # 7
Member
118 posts
Blushing bee

I agree with the other commenters…why don’t you have both walk you down the aisle? Or have one walk you up the 1st half and the other take over from there?

Post # 8
Hostess
16217 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I agree with the other bees too. No reason to let down your dad if not necessary?

Let us know if there’s info we aren’t aware of. 🙂

Post # 10
Member
172 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I think you should do whatever you are most comfortable with and what means the most to you.  You could explain to your dad that it is important to have your son do it, that it involves him in a very special way and is symbolic of your newly formed family.  Would that help him understand?  Is there another way you would want to involve your dad?

[My only experience with this is my first marriage.  I just explained to my biological dad that someone else (my mom) was walking me down.  For me, he didn’t get a vote because it was my decision about what was important and symbolic to me.  As I prepare to get married to the most amazing man I have ever known, I will probably walk alone and, again, not give my biological dad a vote.  My connection to him does not warrant sharing this experience in that way.]

Post # 11
Member
464 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I haven’t told him yet, but will soon inform my dad that he is not walking me down the aisle. Then, I’ll do it again with my stepdad. It’s really going to be hard with both of them, and I know they’ll both be upset, but they’ll have to live with it. I would make them both happy if I could, but I can’t- so my FI and I are going to walk down the aisle together.

I think you should do what you are most comfortable with. If your relationship with your dad has been on-and-off (I totally know what that’s like!), then he doesn’t get automatic “dibs” on walking you down the aisle. Explain gently and kindly to him that you’d like your son to do it, and don’t get too upset if he isn’t happy with your decision. If you’re close enough to him, it might also be good if you could give him another role- like the father daughter dance, or a speech, or something else that would give him a special moment.

Post # 14
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I had my Dad walk me down the asile and when I got to the first row my mom stood up and joined us.  Then they both said “We do” when asked who give’s the bride away.  I think my mom really liked being involved.  I’m glad I had my Dad walk with me because it helped relieve my anixety about tripping and falling.

Could you have your parents and son do the same thing? Have them all stand up with you at the altar and say We Do.  That way they all feel involved in giving you away.

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