(Closed) lied to by best friend

posted 6 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
46236 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

If,as you said, you asked her about her maid of honor for months,she may have thought you were pressuring her to choose you as  the Maid/Matron of Honor and may not have had the courage to tell you she had already chosen someone else.

I think you can both share the blame equally for this unfortunate situation- her for not having the courage to be straight with you, and you for repeatedly asking her about it.

Post # 4
2254 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Are you more upset of the fact she lied to you or because she didn’t ask you to be her Maid/Matron of Honor when her sister backed out? From your comments, it seems you were there to help her a lot as a Maid/Matron of Honor would typically do and you flew to Africa for the wedding which meant a lot of time, effort, and money into attending/preparing for this wedding. Though she shouldn’t have lied to you, I think you are letting the fact she didn’t ask you to be the Maid/Matron of Honor kind of magnify the fact that she lied (wihch is never a good thing). I could be completely off base but this is just my opinion.


Post # 5
1643 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

What an awful situtation for you.  🙁

If I was you, I’d take a deep breath and tell her that you were upset by her actions – but like Olive says – be clear about what you are upset about, the fact she didn’t ask you ton be her Maid/Matron of Honor or the fact she lied.  Because if it is that she asked someone else to be her Maid/Matron of Honor, I think you have to just let it slide, and accept that you can’t make decisions for other people, or foresee how much people value friendships, in comparision to how you value them.  However if you are not so bothered about this aspect, but more that she lied to you, then you have every right to be upset, and should tell her this.

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