So the cost of our venue for booze is ridiculous. Its $11 a person for beer and wine only for 5 hours which FI and I are fine with. FFIL insists we need liquor and the well is good enough. Its literally well...and no captain which is what I know our friends drink and ME included. I don't want to feel like a bad cheap hostess for not having the captain. Granted FIL's are paying for the booze. Well is $14 per person. The next step up is 'top shelf' and $16 per person but includes the good stuff we all love.
What would you rather have as a guest? Do you have any other ideas? I was thinking of asking the venue if we can drop a couple of the liquors available in the top shelf to bring the cost down. No one wants Kahlua...
I think if finances dont allow then you're fine with just offering beer and wine. Youre giving them something to drink all night! I didn't vote because to be honest when I go to a wedding, I ideally will drink wine with dinner and then captain n coke the rest of the night! Id ask the venue if theyd let you have well but with captain at a smaller cost since you dont want the whole "top shelf" available, usually venues will allow this.
@NewYearsEve: So I'm not the only one who goes straight to the Captain haha! If they said Lady Bligh or however you spell it....hell no that stuff is not the same. I don't care how much FFIL says it is, I know its not and so does my FI
@jpalm13: I completely agree with you. My FI and I wont drink that, we'd rather have beer/wine than a bad rum n coke! Captain for us all the way! We actually had to add it into our bar menu because ours didnt include it. Now our contract says in all caps CAPTAIN MORGAN! lol I'm happy :)
@NewYearsEve: HAHA I'll have to try that. Call the place and be like look I want the captain and no one cares about Baileys when you can't do Irish Car Bombs or Kahlua. Take those off make sure we have Captain and lower the price. Kthanks
We are having beer/wine at our reception, I think it's perfectly fine. Some friends of ours already have the heads up and are bringing a flask in ;)
@jpalm13: I voted for well just because I don't enjoy beer or wine. Now, let me say that it is completely up to you, and if I was a guest at your wedding, I wouldn't mind ANY of the options. Its your wedding, do what YOU want :)
My FI thinks that we should just do beer and wine to keep the costs down as well, and I am completely against that right now just because I'm the bride! If I can't drink for free at the wedding I'm paying for, I'm going to be upset!!
Personally, I think it's better to limit things to beer and wine because while people may still become intoxicated, they'll do so a bit more slowly than if you have hard liquor.
As a guest I'd prefer wine, DH would prefer beer. We both like liquor, too, but beer and wine is preferable.
I would prefer beer and wine because I do most of my drinking with food. are they paying for booze no matter what or is this money coming from a total allowance that men's you're sacrificing another thin if you go for the expensive option?
@helenberrycrunch: They are paying for it either way. But I'm looking it as if we're going to offer it, I don't want to offer the well stuff for everyone I know (and I kid you not we all do this) to ask for Captain and be shot down to then request a beer. Why even bother with the liquor then?
Is there the options to pay for the beer/ wine like you plan and your guest can have the option of buying the hard stuff. We came across a similar problem but it was with finding a reasonably priced bartending service. DH and I both rather have Captain than beer or wine! Our venue didn’t have the option of supplying us. Most bartenders I met with said no matter what they would bring an entire bar set up and even if we were only paying for beer and wine, they would give the guest the option of purchasing other drinks. I thought it was tacky at first, but everybody I talked it over with reassured me that it was totally fine. If you go that route, be sure to let guest no if they want more than beer and wine to bring some extra cash…. Good luck!
If they are unwilling to spend more for the top shelf, would you two be willing to cover the difference? If no top shelf, then I'm with you, why bother?
As a guest I am totally happy with just beer and wine especially if you guys are trying to keep costs down. The last few weddings I went to the mixed drinks seemed watered down anyways, which is a crime since I know the bride & groom probably paid a pretty penny to serve liquor!
At this point in time, we're having just beer and wine. I would love to provide a full bar with top shelf liqour but to me it's not worth the extra $1,000-$2,000 so a few people can have a few mixed drinks. That being said, if someone like my dad or FI's dad or whoever comes up to me and says they'll pay for it then by all means, we will have a full bar! Haha
I should add: the hotel *owners* doesn't allow for cash bars at weddings. Stupid, but what can I do?
@whiskeyandrhinestones: I had asked about just buying a couple bottles which I was told is more expensive than buying the liquor package. I was thinking of doing cash for hard liquor though.
@helenberrycrunch: I don't think FI would. Its about a $500 difference and we aren't even planning on having a limo at this point. Here's the list:
Serving just beer and wine can also help keep people from overdoing it (in theory, at least!). You can always get a few bottles of the Captain to share with those folks who need it, or save it for the after party!
And I dunno about you ladies but I almost always switch to beer when the bartender keeps giving .5 ounces of liquor and 16 ounces of juice/pop.
@helenberrycrunch: THANK YOU hahaha FFIL insisted those are perfectly fine choices. They suck!
Yeah, the liquors don't look great. I would rather have beer and wine myself. What about beer, wine, and a signature cocktail? I went to a wedding recently that had the BEST signature cocktail - people asked for them all night! It was a cherry limeade.
@jpalm13: don't get me wrong, I wouldn't bad mouth booze that someone else is paying for, I'd just elect not to drink if those were my choices.
@oneofthesethings: That's what I was thinking with the by the bottle thing but the venue insists it costs more. I think I'm going to go sit down with them and ask about a few options and be a real peach when saying yeah this list really sucks all around and for as much as we'd be paying, you can either change some of these or I'm going beer and wine only.
What about paying by consumption? The vast majority of people going will be old and not drink. Anyone ever done this?
@helenberrycrunch: I totally understand. That's what I was thinking about, too. If I went to a wedding, I may get a Malibu and orange juice but it'd be too sweet for more than 2 drinks.
I would be fine with just the beer and wine. I generally drink wine anyway. But if liquor was there I would probably drink it too. But I actually think $11 per person is really cheap for 5 hours! A glass of wine at a restaurant or bar is $5-$8 each on the lower end.
If you decide you want liquor I would find a way to get the Captain in there since it would be more important to you.
How many people do you have?
We did a consumption bar and it worked out great. However ours was at brunch, so people probably drank less than they might have otherwise.
@kes18: The max is 250. We're aiming for between 200-230 so it isn't cramped. The catch is this- all of FI's family is OLD and left FBIL's wedding after dinner and don't drink, my grandma comes from 7 or 9 cant remember and they're all OLD and don't drink, my grandpa comes from 7 or 9 and they're all OLD and drink beer. All of my parents' friends will drink their fill. FI's younger family drinks cocktails. FI and I and our friends will drink beer, martinis, cran and vodka and captain based drinks....I really think consumption could work out in our favor..
@housebee: They're very.....frugal and by frugal I mean cheap in the kindest way possible. I'd rather just skip it for the not so desirable selection so they can save the money.
@jpalm13: Would you be willing/able to split the difference ($2/person)? That way they could have the liquor, but you and your friends could have captian n' cokes all night.
Truthfully, Id rather have a good beer or wine compared to most of those well choices. However, I do know people who drink Bailey's and Kahula - namely my mom and MIL. So it's not that "no one" drinks those - white russians are very popular (at least in my area).
@housebee: I think based off how many people would truely enjoy the liquor for the cost it wouldn't make much sense. I'm fine with beer, wine and flasks.
@nyscpa2be: I forgot all about those!
@jpalm13: well there's no point in spending money on it if everyone is just going to drink beer and wine anyways. I don't drink, so I'm just really there for cake lol.
@housebee: Agreed. Oh the cake! I just got off the phone with a place about a tiramisu cake mmmm
If they're paying for the liquor and they want it, I would just have them pay for the top shelf, or pay the difference between well and top shelf.
We are having an open bar for beer and wine, there will be liquor there, but the guest will have to pay for it. Beer and wine are what the majority of the guests drink anyway in my bunch.
I'm not an avid drinker. Sure I LIKE some alcohol, but if there's nothing available that I really enjoy I'll stick to Sprite.
I'd rather drink wine and beer than well liquor, but if top shelf was available I might have a mixed drink. To be honest though, even the top shelf offerings on the list from your venue aren't the brands I'd usually request. (I'm not a rum girl, and the vodka, tequila and gin selections are limited.)
I'm much more likely to be happy with a california wine that retails for under $10/bottle than with any liquor that I recall featuring prominently in college costume parties. If your budget will be strained by serving the top shelf bar, then I'd stick with beer & wine. How many people do you know who don't drink wine OR Bud Light? (Did you check the beer list to make sure your perfered brands are available? I had to negotiate with my venue to get a favorite brand included.)
Does your venue offer a "signature drink" option? Perhaps they will negotiate a price to serve beer, wine AND one signature drink (like rum & coke, or margaritas on the rocks, or a fuzzy navel... whatever you like).
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