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I personally wouldn't count on monetary gifts in order to pay for the wedding. Although I don't know specifically what cultural norms you are referencing, I think it's incredibly risky to take a loan, expecting to make back what you pay for the wedding in gifts. Especially in this economy where people are struggling more than they have in the past years. It's just my oppinion, but I would NEVER take a loan to pay for a party! It sets your up for financial difficulty and stress right from the get go.
Thats what I initially said but the more I think about it the more it doesnt sound so bad. I know that the least amount to be expected from any guest is $100. I know no one would give less. If the couldnt afford it they wouldnt show up, theyd let us know that they were having 'troubles'. Both of our familiesand friends follow these...hmm "rules".
Don't do it, if you don't have to. You don't want to start your marriage with more debt than you already have. We are paying for our wedding ourselves and not putting anything on credit. We are paying cash for everything. If you set yourself a budget and stick to it, you can have the wedding you want.
You can use your gifts to help purchase a home or go on a honeymoon. I personally wouldn't count on monetary gifts to pay for our wedding; however, it is not tradition here for guests to give that much money for gifts and we are letting our guests know via word of mouth that their presence at our wedding is gift enough.
Don't do it!! I think if you take a loan you are more likely to have a bigger wedding than you can afford. It's one day! My personal opinion is perhaps you need to wait for a year to save up some additional funds...I also am unsure that it is a good idea to assume all of your guests are going to give you cash. Maybe that really is customary, but are you and your FI not registering for gifts at all? Also, I'm not sure how much money you are thinking you'll need but lets say you think you'll only need $5000 (which is EXTREMELY LOW) you'd need 500 people at the wedding to cover that cost!! And the more people you have the higher the toal amount is going to get so something is not adding up.
I would nix the loan idea. I know that paying for a wedding is HARD! My FI and I decided yesterday to have a small ceremony and cook out with close family and a few friends and then have a marriage celebration ceremony and reception next year. Unconventional? Yes. Is it what I want to do? No. Will it be better for my FI and I? Yes yes yes.
So plan your wedding according to what you can afford at the time. I dont think going into debt for one day is worth it in the end.
Taking out a loan for a wedding is a really bad idea. Starting your marriage that much in debt just for one day isn't worth the stress, the hassle, and did I mention the stress? If we had needed to pay for the wedding ourselves, it would have been our immediate family only with a nice dinner after the ceremony. Nothing fancy, just us getting married, with probably Italian food afterwards. I cannot even IMAGINE taking out a loan- debt stresses me out SO much (I don't even have a credit card) and it's just so not worth it.
I wouldn't take out a loan for a wedding but that's just me. It's one day out of the rest of your lives and you can't bank on making it all back.
Just think of what you'd write on the thank you notes... "Thank you Aunt Betty for your generous gift. Mr. Bunny and I will use it to help pay off our wedding loan!"
Yeah, ditto pps, I don't think taking out a loan is a good idea...I'm not sure if you have any student loans now, but I do and just paying for those is hard enough--and at least I knew those were for a necessary cause: my education. I think if I had to make a payment for a wedding loan every month, I would start to feel really angry at myself for deciding to throw a bigger party than we could afford.
As for depending on cash as gifts for the wedding, I don't know what's customary in your circle. If you know that most people give cash, then chances are, that's what you're going to get. But I would rather throw a wedding we can afford, and then just have extra cash after the wedding from the gifts, instead of having to use it to pay off the loan.
I would NOT recommend taking out a loan for your wedding. Do you really want to START your married life in debt? Debt = Stress. If you can't afford the type of wedding you want now, what is important is that you love each other, and if you need to wait a year to get married to save up, then it will make it meaningful. I would also not recommend counting on monetary gifts at your wedding at all - don't spend money that you don't have. That's just my two cents.
There are plenty of ways to have a classy, understated wedding on a budget. Reduce the amount of flowers, have your wedding on a Friday or Sunday, DIY, look to friends and family with talent...there are endless ways to save money on a wedding. Here's a great article for that:
Are a lot of your guests rich and/or really good friends of yours? If you have any guests who are struggling financially or who are still students or who are putting their kids through college or who aren't necessarily really close friends with you, you may want to lower your expectations on gifts. I would actually expect $20 gifts from some people if I were you. I'm a grad student, and I can't afford to spend lavishly on people, especially if I'm also attending the engagement party, bridal shower and bachelorette party-- If I spent $100 at each event, I wouldn't have enough money to pay my rent! :(
Just make sure that if you do expect cash in addition to gifts from people, you don't hold it against them if/when they can't give you that much... It's not their job to make sure the party can be paid for. And even if you do make up the money you take out as a loan in presents, that doesn't translate into actual money with which you could pay back a loan, unless you really do get a whole bunch of cash from them as well. Especially in these economic times, you might want to lower your expectations a bit just in case... And then if it does work out, you'll be pleasantly surprised! :) Best of luck to you!
Don't do it. It's not worth it at all - it's stressful and you still have to pay the money back, probably with interest. Also, like the others said, don't count on people give you a certain amount its a mere expectation and in this economy, it might be difficult.
I completely understand its difficult to pay for a wedding, but personally, I think a wedding that is within your means is more meaningful and fun to plan, than a lavish one where you owe a lot of money for afterwards. It's only one day and if people are gonna judge you on your wedding day, then they shouldn't be there to begin with!
Good Luck!
I agree ~ don't finance your wedding with a loan. Soon enough you'll be wanting that money for other things: a home, babies, vacations, school, etc. I predict that you'll be mad at yourself for going into debt for a party - esp. if those other things are not available to you because you're already in debt. It's an important day, but it doesn't have to be extraordinarily expensive. Maybe have something simple now, and plan an extravagant blow-out for your 5 year anniversary?
Hm. My first reaction from reading the title was "absolutely don't take out a loan for your wedding." And I still think that, but I do know what you're saying. My family tends to give $75-100 per person ($150-200 per couple) for wedding gifts, so I kind of understand that you're expecting to get a lot of money from the wedding itself. While it is by no means necessary for them to give that amount, that's what customary in my family, so it is "expected." Wouldn't you rather have that money to use for your honeymoon or put a down payment on a house or to save? I would say to scale back the wedding as much as you can to keep it within what you can afford and use a loan as an absolute last resort.
i wouldnt do it because in this economy, you really CANT expect that much from people, unless they are loaded, and even then those folks are tightening the purse strings too. Honestly do what you can pay for now, for instance, FH myself and my parents are doing a "pay as you go" kinda thing where we pay the bills as we come - not really saving but not going into debt either.
you dont want to have the first thing you have to deal with as a married couple is pay off your wedding debt.
So in the best worlds, every couple or guest gives you $120. If you take out a loan you throw an amazing party but lets say half of all your gifts go towards paying off the wedding. If you don't take out a loan, you throw a smaller, still amazing party, but you take home all the money to spend on you and your spouse.
Someone once told me, if you can save even $400 dollars on your wedding - think what you and your husband could do with that money: camping equipment, furniture, awesome dinners out.
I think don't take the loan, simply because money can really be put to better places than a wedding.
I would not take out a loan for a wedding and I certainly wouldn't count on monetary gifts to pay if off afterwards. That is a terrible idea. I am not sure where you are from, but I am not having a wedding to get gifts or money from my guests. And if they couldn't afford a gift at all I wouldn't care.
I'm going to differ a little from most of the PPs and say that it depends on the loan in comparison to the rest of your financial picture. Putting a thousand or so on a credit card to be paid off in the next six months either by wedding gifts or by skipping dinners out is not that big a deal if you have good jobs, and might be better than draining your savings entirely. And don't forget the importance of establishing a credit history. But I don't think you should throw a party you really can't afford and depend on gifts to keep you afloat. If you're looking at a major $10K+ loan I wouldn't do it. Those are for car and house and school IMO.
My opninion runs with the majority of people here. No, don't do it. You don't know what people are facing financially right now so you can't readily count on the fact that the loan can be paid off from gifts. Also, don't start your life together in debt.
i agree with hopewell, depending on a couple's financial status, income, job security etc, putting some things on credit rather than spending savings can certaintly work out. it sounds however that op is banking on the guests cash gifts to help make the payments. i would never imagine getting such generous gifts from my family and friends.
the tricky thing about credit is if you have it, you spend it, and it makes it easier to spend more than you need to or you would otherwise.
if you have for example $2000 in the bank and you get a $2000 credit card with 0%apr for like a year, then yes, spend the credit card instead of the savings. but not both. then you can divide the $2000 savings into 12 payments over the year. this will build credit, give a little breathing room for heaven forbid, emergencies etc but you really arent spending money you dont have. then if you get cash gifts, you can decide to use them to pay off debt sooner than originally planned.
pp made a great point though, to have a $5000 wedding "paid for by cash gifts", you would have to have about 500 guests. and it is extremely rare for weddings to be less than 5k with very small guest lists. just not practical.
i personally am using a combination of mostly cash and some credit for our wedding. we are chosing to have our wedding right after our home renovations will be finished. when they are done though, we will be living rent free and the ONLY bills we will have are food/personal items and debt. (no electric, cable, water, laundry, etc). it is our priority to wed this year and spend next year paying off all of our debt rather than wait a year.
if we had rent and utilities to pay (or if we wanted to buy a house) etc, we would have to wait, or have a much smaller affordable wedding. our income will allow us to pay off most of our overall debt our first year married.
if you decide that your regular life budget can comfertably afford a loan payment, (regardless of gifts) and its more important to you and ur fi to wed this year, then go for it. people make that choice all the time when they spend credit cards for things they could wait for.
sorry this is long, but one last note, however negative. how terrible would it be if you went into debt to afford this day and after much of that money is spent, the engagement is called off or something crazy happens that prevents the wedding this year?\
Do not rely on monetary gifts at all. While some people will give cash gifts, many will not so don't assume they will. It is ok to break the tradition of what is common in your area if it does not fit your means. Don't go into debt for one day. If you can't afford to pay for the wedding yourselves without a loan, scale back to what you can pay for yourselves. If you get a loan, you will be paying it off years after the wedding is over.
I'm not totally against the idea of taking out a loan to pay for the wedding but agree with others that it depends on your financial/personal situation and how much of the cost of the wedding are you considering in getting.
I too have an expectation of a minimum of $100 per person for guests but consider whatever I get more like bonus money. Although I know this is the norm for weddings in my culture/family I am also aware of the economic situation and cannot depend/count on it.
I do believe that there are ways to save money or to borrow well. My fiance and I have made great sacrifices in the past two years to save up for a down payment for a home. Now that we are engaged and want to get married soon our goals have shifted slightly. Of course we don't want to touch our down payment and so we will continue our budgeting and saving but this time for the wedding. We are also taking a credit card balance transfer for 0% for 15 months to use and then pay it in full with our savings when the 15 months is up. I'd rather keep my savings earning interest in the bank then have to spend it now!
My advice is to review your financial situation, review your short-term and long-term goals and then look at what your options are to achieve those goals. Whatever you decide, I hope it works out!
kit, sounds like a great idea, just make sure that there isnt a balance transfer fee!
I think taking out a loan for anything that depreciates in value (which is basically everything but education and a house) is a really bad idea. It essentially means you can't afford your lifestyle, to be blunt. And at the end of the day you'll be married, have pretty pictures, and maybe some cake. That's it. Are you willing to pay for the next five or ten years for that?
I think it's crazy to take out a loan for a wedding. If you can't afford it, either have a smaller wedding or wait a bit longer and save up. You can't rely on your gifts for paying back the loan as you don't know whether you'll get any gifts, let alone how much they'll be. It may be good etiquette to bring a gift to a wedding but that doesn't mean it's obligatory! Seriously, what's the point in starting your life together in debt?
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Someone propsed the idea of taking out a loan to pay for the wedding. So, thatwe wont have to worry so much about whats coming and going right now. (but still keep track of course!).
Its customary here for the gues to give on average $120 as a gift at the reception dinner in order to help out the new couple. Im not too sure if this is done in other parts.
Anyhow, I guess it makes sense, but Im not too sure about going through with it.
In the end, the 'gifts' pay for the wedding and hopefully more;)
The traditional gifts (registry gifts) are given at the bridal shower. Toasters, blenders, china, etc. Again not sure whats done in other areas and cultures.