Post # 1
I’m just wondering if anyone else has been through this. I just got married, and I love my husband. I enjoy being with him, and spending time with him, and married life is great. 🙂
The problem is that he works full-time, and I don’t have a job. I’m looking for one, but have nothing right now. We moved for his job (I couldn’t find one at home either), so we don’t know anyone in town. His car is broken, so until it’s fixed, he drives mine to work, which means I have no way to get out during the day. So I can’t volunteer, can’t go to Starbucks and read, can’t go browse Michael’s…
When DH gets home after work, he’s tired. We take the dog on a walk, then come back, and he just sits until dinner time. I’m getting frustrated because he doesn’t really wanna hang out, or go on picnics, or go to trivia on the weekdays, and I realise it’s because he’s my only social interaction. He’s getting frustrated because I’m always asking him to talk to me, and he’s already told me about his whole day, and I have nothing to tell. I look forward to weekends just as much as him because I get to hang out with him and leave the house. I don’t want kids right now, but I’m jealous of new moms because at least they have groups on Meetup.com. There aren’t any for a girl in her mid 20s with no kids.
I just don’t know what I should do.
Post # 3
I went through the same thing but with my boyfriend. I was unemployed and he worked 40-50 hours a week. When he got home the first thing he wanted to do was rest and have alone time and instead I would pounce on him with all my attention.
It totally sucks, but it can be eased by doing other things. How far away are places in your town? Mine is easier because the nearest shops are only 2 miles away. If you can walk, I suggest you go outside as much as you can. Even if its a 3-4 mile walk, once you’re in town you can stay there for a few hours before heading back. And that way you have more of a chance to meet people. In my experience, the more time I spent outside of the home the less I needed to rely on him for social engagement. But I’m a pretty inclusive character, so even being around crowds (without talking to anyone) wore me out and made me need quiet time.
Also, if you’re a diy-er- start a list of projects you want to tackle. Might as well make the most of your time 😀 I made so much awesome stuff.
Post # 4
@sweetpea87: I feel for you and hope your situation gets better soon.
I’ve been thinking about things you could do, based on what you’ve said. Have you thought about dog-walking for your neighbours? That would get you out meeting people (clients and others on your walk), exercise you and your pooch, and earn some money. Also, if you were within walking distance of your local hospital, I’ve heard of some dogs (temperament allowing) being taken in so patients can ‘pet’ them.
Anyway, just a couple of ideas to get you started and these are the kind of things it would be lovely to share with your hubby when he gets home…
Post # 5
Both FI and I have been there.
I was really sick for about a year and a half. Worked part time from home, was basically bedridden. For a guy whose main social interaction is usually his bouncy girlfriend, he was going a little bonkers. I was going bonkers because it felt like I was alone all of the time, my usual social interaction couldn’t be done because I couldn’t go anywhere.
The solution: Get hobbies.
I learned to knit and invited friends over as often as I could handle it (about once a week). Ravelry is an awesome place for knitting/crochet projects and discussion. It kept my mind busy but didn’t require me to leave the house. Having people visit always made me happy, but again, didn’t require me to leave. I don’t know what your computer is like, but one of my favorite MMOs just went free to play (City of Heroes) if you’re at all into video games. (Its a social one, so you can make friends and play with them, there are other reasons I suggest it to adults who don’t want to sink their life into a video game that I can discuss if you’re at all interested.)
FI joined a gym and started training with a small group of people for various runs and met up with some guys on occassion. (His group all had sick significant others, so it was a good place for him to let off stress that didn’t make me feel like the worst girlfriend ever.)
Can you drop him off and pick him up from work so that you have a car during the day? Even one or two days a week would give you a lot more freedom. I don’t know what is in your neighborhood, but maybe you could volunteer at the local elementary school?