Post # 1
My mom’s friend just asked me to give her a list of people I’d like to invite to my bridal shower. My family moved around when I was young and since I moved to this new city, I don’t know many people. I’m in an isolating job and my fiancee is kind of an introvert too. I’m realizing that I literally have like two friends that live here. I have never felt so lonely as I do now, adding on the fact that everyone has been asking me.. why aren’t you having a bridal party…what about a bachelorette…and all that stuff. The pressure I have got from my family and older women asking me these kinds of questions is crazy…I feel really judged for not having many friends and it’s just adds to the loneliness I already feel on a given day.
I did not realize marrying my significant other would cause such heartache for me socially. Our wedding invite list is mostly his friends and family. I haven’t had any close girl friends get married and feel like I’m the only one in the world that has gone through this.
Post # 2
Even if my FI and I could afford a big, traditional wedding, we would still just have a civil ceremony with just the two of us. We’d have a very difficult time inviting more than 20 people – all family. My best friends are my sisters and FSIL, and I’m okay with that. It’s not just you. Not everyone is a social butterfly.
Post # 3
Don’t worry! I felt the same way in the begining. I have only 1 really good friend and a couple people I would call friends but don’t see nearly as often. I felt like I needed to make a bunch of friends so I could have a bunch of bridesmaids. However in the process I realized I was happier with just my couple existing friends.
My mother in law is throwing me a shower and I only invited my one friend and then a few of my mom’s friends that have known me since I was little. I don’t feel bad because these are the people that love me and support me, even if they aren’t technically friends. What matters isn’t how popular you are, focus on who you love even if it’s just family. They love you and wont judge you on how many or how few friends you have.
Post # 4
So you do realize that it sounds like you have plenty of family who are close to you (since they’re planning a bridal shower for you and asking you questions), right? So that’s great! There aren’t tons of ppl who live close to and have tons of friends AND family. I realized early on that my shower will be kinda different because there’ll be almost no family- I live on one coast while my family lives on the other. We aren’t on speaking terms w my FI’s family. So you’ll have family there, but very few friends and I’ll have the opposite.
Post # 5
You’re not alone… My best friend is my sister. I’ve shed lots of friends as the years went by… Sure, I’ll have my FI’s friends at my bridal shower, but there are literally a handful of ladies I will want there. There are plenty of other shy girls just like us out there.
Post # 6
I don’t have that many friends either, because I’ve always been massively introverted… I have maybe three or four really good friends, the sort of friends I might have had in a bridal party. Alas, all my friends are in Finland, which is where I’ve lived my entire life, but the wedding is happening in San Diego, where I’m moving. So, I have a very small number of friends to begin with, and now I’m moving to a place where I know virtually no-one, save for my FI’s family! I’ll have a small bachelorette party of some sort (it won’t be a party per se, we’ll probably have some kind of city adventure and then a game/movie night because none of us are all that into wild partying, and I don’t even drink alcohol) in Finland before I leave, but there will be no bridal shower or bridal party, for that matter, because only one of them can make it to the wedding.
It does make me feel pretty lonely sometimes… Especially when I know how hard it is for me to make friends, and now I have to leave all the ones I have behind at a very crucial time in my life. I’m sure I’ll make new friends in America eventually, but it doesn’t do much for wedding planning and related events. FI has lots of friends who will be helping us out with the wedding, which is very nice of them and much appreciated. But sometimes it almost feels like their presence underlines the fact my friends can’t be there, and I won’t be seeing them for possibly years…
Thankfully I don’t really mind being alone that much. Still, it’d be nice to have more people to gush about the wedding with, at least.