- 6 years ago
- Wedding: August 2013
Apologies in advance, this may be long.
So… Long distance relationships… Ugh. I’m 100% certain that marrying my fiance is what I want to do. But the other day I got some news that really upset me.
First off, some backstory… My SO is British and I’m American, and we’ve been engaged for about 10 months. Earlier this year we lived together while I was studying abroad and it was amazing. We were considering getting married before I needed to come back stateside so that I could stay there; unfortunately, after looking into the recently instated immigration laws, we realized he didn’t make the income requirements needed to bring one’s non-EU spouse over. He’s in college training to be a carpenter and working part-time, and will be finished in June 2013. So, after talking it over, we decided to get married in August 2013.
Last night though, while talking on Skype, we were talking about how bad the economy is. I asked him what would happen if he wasn’t able to get a job right away, and he admitted that if it came down to it he might need to go back for an additional year for more specialized training. I childishly said “No! I don’t want to wait any longer to be with you!” and he told me to try not to worry about it now, but I need to prepare myself mentally to be honest. I asked him if we should postpone the wedding (we were planning on having it here in the states since I have a bigger family than he does) and he said absolutely not.
So of course, that got me thinking again. When we get married, what if I have to wait another year to be with my husband? Or even two years? The thought is heart-wrenching to me. I’m trying to think of it in the way that military wives have to when their husbands are overseas (luckily for me, his everyday life will be much less dangerous), but it’s still very hard to take in.
Just an FYI, we have an amazing relationship. We never argue, we have very good communication, there are no trust issues, he’s very reassuring in my moments of insecurity (which usually stem from my own self-esteem issues, rather than him doing/saying something to make me feel worried). The only problem is that darned distance!
So bees, any advice? Thanks in advance.