(Closed) LONG DISTANCE = MET ONLINE ? :-)

posted 5 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 3
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@Lauren8712:  Geez, I’m just stalking your threads, aren’t I? 😛

My FH and I met online. These days, I’m not afraid to admit it to people, but in the beginning and for a long time I was because it was many years ago when meeting someone online was like, seriously shady, no-no business. And I was quite young to boot (it was in an online chatroom/game type thing) so I had major concerns about my parents finding out about it.

We’ve been speaking for almost 11 years, but been in a relationship for almost 7 years. Because of the taboo around it at the time, I even kept it hush-hush from my parents. When they finally found out about the “someone” I was only 16/17 and knew they’d freak if I told the truth so I made up a white lie that we didn’t meet online. With my immediate family that white lie still haunts me. Been trying to figure out how to admit it to them for a while. I’m not so worried about the admitting of having met him online (that isn’t as taboo/bad as it was, plus they love him so I have no worries), but rather confessing to having lied for so long.

Post # 4
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Lauren8712: I met mine online and our relationship has been 100% long distance since then! Since he’s so far we only get to see each other once or twice a year … but we talk every day :). I can’t wait til we can finally be married and live together once and for all!!

 

@LostInWonderland:  Wow, my story is almost identical to yours! I ended up telling my parents last year (FI and I met 6+ years ago). It’s so nice to know that I’m not the only one who went through all that with family/parents. 

 
 EDIT: (And, if you do decide ot tell them, I’m sure that they will be fine! I’m sure it won’t be a big deal to them especially since they already love him…it’s just a minor detail, I suppose. But I know it feels bad knowing you haven’t told the truth … so if you do decide to tell them… i’d just find the appropriate time and just explain why you felt like you wanted to tell them what you did initially… that’s what i did! )

Post # 6
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@kmaemu:  Good for you for telling them! And congratulations on finally setting a date to close the distance! How did you go about telling them? How did they react?

 

EDIT: Haha, your edit beat me to it. Still, though… How did they react? I don’t even know what to say! Or how to go about it! Every time I consider telling them, I chicken out and my stomach flips. I am so worried, especially because I lie about it almost all the time. Every once and a while they realize how vague my explanation of our meeting is and ask, and I sort of glaze over with my lies. I end up kicking myself in my head thinking about how I’m digging a deeper hole.

Post # 7
Member
945 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

FI and I met online 🙂 Not on an online dating site, but online nonetheless. 🙂

Post # 8
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@Lauren8712:  Lol, the freaking is what I was worried about! Especially because I was 16/17. That was five years ago. So again, it wasn’t that common at the time, plus I was so young that my mom was always expressing concern.

“Who are you talking to online?” – Mom

“My friends.” – 16 year old me

“Do you know them in real life?” – Mom

“…… Yeah.” – 16 year old me

“Okay! Because you know some people are sick…” – Mom

“… I know, mom…” – 16 year old me.

Post # 9
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@LostInWonderland:  I SOOOO know what you’re going through right now. Will PM you!

 

@miss.wiggums:  same here! I wasn’t even really ‘looking’ for anyone at the time, it just happened. 🙂

Post # 11
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@kmaemu:  Good to know I’m not the only one who has gone through this! Okay, sounds good!

 

@Lauren8712:  Ah, gotcha. Haha, well, its good that it went down well!

Post # 12
Member
1466 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I met my FI online too; I am not one for bars, clubs, or fix ups. It was the best thing I have ever done because we have so much in common and we just clicked. I personally think when you meet someone online and you connect and the relationship is more indepth because you dont necessarily have the same issues you would have if you met at a bar.

You get the know the person pretty quickly and both sides can say things they would have held off saying face to face. I think it creates a safe place to land emotionally because there arent moments when you have feelings of awkwardness.

Given the fact that most of us have busy lives and online is the only way we can meet people in a safe environment. There use to be a stigma attached to online dating years ago but it has since passed.

I know there have been horror stories about online dating but I think it has a lot to do with the site you are on.

Post # 13
Member
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I met my husband online when I was 12 and he was 13 almost 14. We were on a game (if I mentioned the name of the type of game or how it worked, I don’t think most would get it, lol… only my friends I still talk to that I met on there know what I’m talking about and another person I’ve come across online) and just started hanging out and talking on it. Our moms took us to meet eachother a couple of times and that was always fun but we were so awkward, ahahaha.  Once we hit 16 or so, we lost, reconnected in our early/mid-20s, I moved to North Dakota (I’m from Minnesota) for a year to live with him so we didn’t have to keep the LDR stuff up, then almost exactly a year later, we moved to Minnesota where we still are now. 🙂

I don’t mind telling people the meeting online part, it’s HOW we met online that gets difficult because it’s pretty much just met with blank stares, haha. I get why, it’s super nerdy but it’s just hard because of that. We’ve been talking and I’ve known him for almost over half of my life now, wow never thought of it that way. 😮

Post # 14
Member
109 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Yeah, we met online. Not your typical chatroom or christianmingle either. As it happens, we met on Xbox Live. Yeah, all it took was some lame Scottish accent and I was like, hey whats your skype handle!? And as they say, the rest is history. But you know what they say, couples that game together, stay together! ha

Post # 15
Member
134 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I met my FH online, as well. (Not online dating, on a text-based RPGohgodeveninthisthreadiwanttohidemynerddom)

My parents and close family know. Work buddies, etc – I tell them I met him while he was on vacation down here. This is two fold, because as I’ve already indicated I have pretty severe ‘nerd shame’, and because I openly admit I don’t want the judgey looks some of them will give me.

Post # 16
Member
268 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I met my hubby in an online game in 2002ish (Everquest for those wondering).  He lived in the Netherlands and was usually online when I got home from work so we’d play with each other.

Then we started chatting on instant messenger and then webcam.  Finally some friends of ours in that game told us that we really need to meet, which we did in summer 2005.  December 2005 I sold all my stuff and moved over here.

Really, I don’t mind telling people I met hubby online.  I’m not into partying, bars, or the club scene and there weren’t many people with my interest within the 60 miles of where I lived that were single.  I just count myself lucky I found someone involved in the same things I like and my parents adore him.

The fact that they finally started taking trips to Europe to “visit” didn’t hurt either. LOL

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