Long table seating woes – can I split up the bridal party?

posted 3 years ago in Reception
Post # 2
Member
7193 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

peonyinparis:  You can do what you want! Once you’re all at one table, I think the traditional seating rules (with only certain people at the head table) go out the window.

In fact, you seem to be mixing two traditions anyway. Usually the bridesmaids are next to the bride (away from their partners) or with their partners (away from the bride). It’s pretty unusual to have the bridesmaids and their partners up near the bride.

The last wedding I was at had two long tables, and people were just say near people they knew, regardless of whether they were in the bridal party. 

As for who goes on the end: so long as people are near people they know, even the person in a corner should have 3 people they can talk to. You should probably avoid putting someone at the very end (the “head”) of the table. I have heard it can be a good rule to put louder / more sociable people at the ends, because they can make conversation even with less people near them. If you have kids or teenagers who know each other, you could also put them all in one “block” at one end.

Post # 3
Member
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

peonyinparis:  We are sort of doing this.  Are you sitting on both sides of the long table? Can she sit across some how?  I personally wouldn’t want to be too far away if I was a BM… I dunno, I’d feel kinda left out.  Then again she did kind of invite herself. However, ultimately it is you and your FI’s choice.

Can I ask if you are sitting at a standard 30″ wide table?  We are trying to figure out if we should push two together so the table is 5 ft wide but thats causing so many problems with table clothes!

Post # 5
Member
1236 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - San Francisco, CA

I was in a wedding where each member of the bridal party was seated at a different table (we were told we were “envoys of the couple”?!), and none of us were with people we knew. Like, the entire table was new people, not even couples were seated together. It was awkward, so generally I’m agaisnt splitting up the bridal party. Nonetheless, if EVERYONE is at one table, I would say it’s not that big a deal. Just make sure everyone is near someone who speaks their language!

Post # 6
Member
7385 posts
Busy Beekeeper

We had about the same number of people and a long table. We just let everyone sit where they wanted to. It was much easier and everyone got to sit where they wanted. We sat int he middle but moved about to talk to guests.

Post # 7
Member
7281 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

In this kind of seating plan there isn’t really a need to seat the bridal party together. Rather, you need to think more about what groups of people mix best together (or don’t!). Think about the 2 people sitting on either side of a given person, as well as the 3 -4people sitting across from them. That defines your groupings. Feel free to mix and match in order to assure good conversation flow.

Post # 8
Member
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

peonyinparis:  Your most recent response makes sense. Sounds like you have a good plan.

Your tables are about 4 ft across, so I don’t think thats too much and conversation will flow just fine.  Just make sure you put compatible people together!

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