Post # 1
How awful is it really to have a lopsided bridal party?
When FI and I first discussed the whole wedding party thing I thought we had agreed that we would have 6 each (we’re having 200 ppl at our wedding). I went ahead and asked my ladies- all 6 of them.
He asked his brother, and then started dragging his feet. Then he asked my cousin, who he’s not especially close with….and then continued to drag his feet even more.
Now he’s saying that he really just want his brother. IMO, it’s not ok to un-ask my cousin, and at the same time it’s not ok to have him as a groomsman if the only other one is FI’s brother – especially when he and my cousin aren’t that close. I told him it would be totally fine if he came up with 4 total…and he’s still dragging his feet.
I dont want a wedding party of 6 bridesmaids and a best man.
how can I gently address this? 🙁
Post # 3
@TerraWellness: oooh boy! Im okay with lopsided parties, but six and one would look pretty “odd”. Is he close enough to some of the girls that some could just physically stand on his side at the alter? I dont know…ack..i really dont have a suggestion besides explaining the situation to the girls or you aksing another 5 guys to stand up for you FI!
Post # 4
We are having uneven attendants as well. My FI has two circles of friends (childhood and school) that he could not decide between and decided to invite them all. He will be having 6 GMs. I have only decided to have 4 BMs. I didn’t want to ask two additional friends to be a BMS just so that they will fill a spot – I wanted specific people to be with me on this special day and did not want additional drama in asking the wrong people to be with me. He might also be thinking this too
Does your FI know the purpose of groomsmen? Sometimes they may not, so you can help to discuss the groomsmen role and help to brainstorm if there are people he knows who fit this bill.
Post # 5
If he won’t ask any more, maybe you can have your MOH and Best Man only stand by your side at the altar, and have the other bridesmaids process in and then sit in the front row. That way all your girls are honored, but you still have symmetry in pictures during the ceremony.
Post # 6
- Wedding: October 2011 - Tre Bella, Mesa, AZ
You may not want to do this (not sure how traditional your wedding is), but if the girls haven’t bought their dresses yet, and you don’t care if they aren’t men, they could get black dresses and be on the grooms’ side if you don’t mind him borrowing them? 🙂 Kind of the next step from Baileyh’s suggestion. Or ask some men from either family if they would be in the wedding party.