- 6 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
Waiting Bees, I totally get your craziness now. 😉
I’m in a weird no-man’s-land of starting to plan but not able to make it all “official” because he’s saving the last little bit of money to get a ring. For all I know it may even be in the mail at this point (I dont’ know for sure, but I believe he’s getting an Asha).
What makes this even crazier is that we’ve already picked a date (very few options due to family schedules) and it’s going to be a tight squeeze. So, I’m anxious to get into serious planning, going through the typical emotional upheaval of wondering and waiting (I’m the “I’ll believe it when I see it” type), and in general just making myself crazy. I find myself even being somewhat resentful–part of me wants to say, “I’ll see you when you have the ring. Until then, just go away.” LOL! I would miss him terribly–just one day apart right now is making me miss him–but the lack of certainty is making me nuts. Especially since I could take it or leave it as far as a ring is concerned, but it’s important to him that I have one.
I’m a “planner” as a way to cope with anxiety, and I’ve just about maxed out the planning I can do as an unofficial. In the meantime, work has slowed to a crawl, giving me even more time to obsess about this.
Arrrgghhhh!!! *running off screaming and waving hands in the air*
There. I feel better. I think…
Edit: About 10 days ago when I was feeling a little down about something else, he said, “Think diamond thoughts.” He never says things like that, so I took it as a sign that he’s made the payment and is expecting the ring any day, now. So, I’m living on pins and needles… and obsessive thoughts, haha! But then I can tell myself that surely I misunderstood, so I shouldn’t expect anythinng… ARRRGGGHHH! (Did I mention that I was losing my mind? Haha!)