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Venting about my Mom.... LONG

Lost diamond - So sad.

posted 2 years ago in Rings
  • poll: If you lost your center stone (diamond or otherwise), would you replace it?
    Yes! With a similar/same cut/size one. : (54 votes)
    51 %
    Yes! But it's UPGRADE time! : (21 votes)
    20 %
    Yes, but with a different cut/or different setting. : (5 votes)
    5 %
    I would now, but if it was many years down the road, maybe not. : (20 votes)
    19 %
    No, I'd just wear my wedding band. : (1 votes)
    1 %
    I don't have a center stone in my e-ring/wedding ring design : (1 votes)
    1 %
    This is why I rarely wear my e-ring! : (1 votes)
    1 %
    Other : (3 votes)
    3 %
  •  
    1.
    Bee
    1,973 posts
    Buzzing bee
    maryjane    September 9, 2009   Grand Forks, ND

    Not my diamond - my grandma's.

    She and grandpa were on a trip in a city far from home recently, and she lost the diamond out of her wedding ring. The diamond she's had for 60 years. She thinks she whacked her hand while getting off a bus or something and knocked it loose. Grandma and grandpa called the bus company, the taxi they took, and a train they'd ridden on... no sign of it. She knows she lost it on the trip because she remembers polishing it up while traveling.

    She was so sad about it, she could barely talk about it without getting watery eyes.

    That ring's been on her hand since she was 20 or so. It's so well-worn that the band has nearly fused to the e-ring. It's a beautiful symbol of my grandparents' long and happy marriage. To see her without her ring on was so strange.

    Grandma was thinking of just having the crown removed so that she could wear the bands without the diamond. To her, it just wouldn't be the same to buy a new one...

    What would you do if you lost your life-long diamond? Would you buy a new diamond?

    I think I'd buy a new stone at this point in my life - I haven't had the ring that long and buying a new stone wouldn't be a big deal, emotionally, to me. My ring's insurance would cover the cost. I'd mostly be sad that I'd lost it - I hate losing stuff. My mom bought a new stone for hers years ago too. But if it'd been many many years... I don't know what I'd do.

     
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    Helper bee
    Miss Cherry Limeade    10/9/10  

    That's horrible!  I feel so bad for your grandma.  I guess I'm in the same boat as you.  If it happened to me today, I'd probably get a new stone.  But if it happened to me much later into my marriage, I don't know what I would do.  I think the ring would have so much more meaning and memories then, that I would consider it almost irreplaceable.

     
    3.
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    459 posts
    Helper bee
    Miss Starlet    June 8, 2009   MI

    That's so sad! I don't know if I could bear to put a new stone in! But I don't think I could bear not wearing it!

     
    4.
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    128 posts
    Blushing bee
    kpenn    September 20, 2008   Ontario, Canada

    I don't know what I would do either!  I would be devastated :-(

    I wear my grandmother's engagement ring on my right hand - it is just a very small diamond (they were both immigrant farmers and got engaged/ married right after my grandfather got back from WWII), and I know if I lost HER diamond I wouldn't know what to do. I think I would have a harder time losing her diamond than one of mine at this point.  To me her ring represents the 50 years she and my grandfather were married and all they went through. And although my rings represent my committment to my husband and our marriage, I think that being married less than a year, it would be somehow easier to replace one of mine. (if that makes any sense)

     
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    Honey
    Beekeeper
    ejs4y8    June 20, 2009  

    I'd be sad, too. It's like wearing through your teddy bear you've had as a child.

    That being said, I try to look at things like "things" in general and I'd replace it and have my husband give it to me or use it as a chance to get something that was more "me" at that point in my life. Who knows what I'll want in 50 years. I mean it's not like you can get the exact same stone (particularly mine, it's a square cushion and they usually aren't square). My mom has had her ring for 25 years and she's had to replace a few diamonds. I mean, it happens. It sucks, though, big time. And I hate losing anything, right down to hair pins and mascara or more recently, my new Tide pen. Grr.

    With about 2 dozen stones in my engagement and wedding bands, I've just come to the reality that at some point in my life, I likely WILL lose a piece of it.

     
    6.
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    258 posts
    Helper bee
    MayBee    May 22, 2010   Manchester, NH

    Ohhh....your poor Grandma!!  I would be heartbroken!  MAYBE some sort of diamond miracle will happen, and one of the people she contacted will call her to say they've found it!  I know....it's a long shot...but I really hope that that's what happens!!  I worry about that happening too!  In fact, the other day I was taking off my rings before showering and was stupidly standing in front of the bathroom sink, which happens to have an open drain...and lost my grip on my e-ring...it fell into the sink and sort of circled around...LUCKILY I somehow mangaged to grab it before it slipped down the drain...THANK GOD!  I would have been devastated if I had lost it.  I am so sorry for your grandma...and again, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that maybe somre sort of miracle will happen for her.  She sounds lovely!

     
    7.
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    Bumble bee
    Miss Hot Sauce    3/13/2010   Cypress, TX

    Poor grandma!

    I would be devasted. FI wants to get a whole new ring when we get married. He said this one was just to go through the ritual of asking for me to marry him. However, I love my ring and have decided, we are NOT getting an entire new one. I will add to this one. I love the solitaire, I love the princess cut and I love the tiffany setting. It has a flaw in it which he hates but to me is what makes it MY diamond. I told him years down the line we could upgrade to a better and bigger diamond, but we're not going to sweat it right now. I feel like upgrading the diamond is ok as long as iget to keep some part of what he originally gave me. Make sense?

     
    8.
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    2,188 posts
    Buzzing bee
    Erindesmar    October 17, 2009   Boston, MA

    I can't vote because I honestly don't know what I would do!  I think I would replace the stone though.  At this point, I would replace it for the same stone cut, color, etc.  In five years, would I do the same?  Probably?  Though I might upgrade a hair.  I just can't see myself getting a huge diamond to replace the one that my FI so carefully picked out.

    PS I lost the pearl necklace that my parents gave me for my 21st birthday.  I think the clasp was loose.  When I got to work it was gone.  Unfortunately I take public transportation so there is little to no chance it will be found... I am heartbroken over it.

     
    9.
    Bee
    1,973 posts
    Buzzing bee
    maryjane    September 9, 2009   Grand Forks, ND

    @MayBee - me too! I keep praying that the bus driver will call and be honest and say he found it jammed under a rubber mat, or SOMETHING.

     
    10.
    Bee
    1,973 posts
    Buzzing bee
    maryjane    September 9, 2009   Grand Forks, ND

    @Miss Hot Sauce - hah, mine has a little feather flaw in it too (only visible from the back, which you can't see in the setting). And Mr. MJ has offered to get a different one. but this one's MINE! I love MINE! Laughing

     
    11.
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    10 posts
    Newbee
    Wedding Rings Forever       Utah

    Consider replacing it with a CZ, that way you won't be so bummed if you lose it in the future and nobody will be able to tell anyway.

     
    12.
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    Beekeeper
    Lillindy    September 2008   Bay Area, CA

    Ahh your poor grandma!  I have to admit, I LOVE LOVE LOVE big flashy jewelry and if I lost my diamond and got that check from the insurance company I would probably upgrade since they cover the appraisal value of my ring/diamond, not what we actually paid so I would have a little extra money to play with.  I have to say, though, I would be heartbroken. 

     
    13.
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    1,046 posts
    Bumble bee
    kmattso2    May 22, 2010   Morris, IL

    This is such a tough call....your poor grandma!!! My fiance gave me his great-grandma's ring which is at least 80 years old.  I'm terrified that something will happen to it and I will feel absolutely terrible.  While I love it and the story behind it I'm kind of looking forward to the day a few years from now when he promised me he would be me a ring of my own just so I can "retire" his ggma's ring and not have to worry about losing it or the stone.

     
    14.
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    Blushing bee
    April.H       Kansas

      Oh, your poor Grandma! i could only imagine how heartbreaking that would be! I don't even know that I could replace my diamond in my ring if somthing happened to it and I've only had it about four years! It has a visible inclusion and to be honest, everytime I get it cleaned I look for it to make sure it's still mine! For some reason, it makes it more special to me. (Weird right?)

      I don't know what I would do in her shoes. But if she thinks she'd feel better to have it made into just bands she could do that or while it's not nearly the same, maybe something very similiar to the diamond she had could be put in.

     

     
    15.
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    3,122 posts
    Sugar bee
    tessabella76    September 12, 2009   Ohio

    How sad! I'd be devastated. I've actually had two separate dreams that I lost my diamond. So now I wake up in the middle of the night and I feel my ring to make sure my diamond is still there!

     
    16.
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    2,099 posts
    Buzzing bee
    caitlanc    September 12, 2009   Western Slope of Colorado

    Oh man!  That's awful!  You never know what will happen though.  A family friend went swimming in our irrigation ditch (it's probably 15-20 ft across and 12 ft deep and flows ~4 miles an hour) and lost his wedding band.  We figured it was long gone but we actually found it months later when they drained the canal to clean it! 

    If I lost my diamond I don't know what I would do.  My fiance's aunt gave it to him to give to me so even though it's not an heirloom or anything it would feel odd to replace it.  I don't know.  I probably would but it wouldn't be until we had the spare cash lying around which would take a long while. 

     
    17.
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    1,198 posts
    Bumble bee
    lemondrop    March 13, 2010   Arizona

    A similar thing happened to my grandma several years ago- while on a boat in Lake Michigan, we watched it fall right into the water.  Very sad at the time, but my grandpa got her a new one and she loves to tell that story now.  It was part of the reason why I decided on a bezel setting when we chose my ring. 

     
    18.
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    271 posts
    Helper bee
    ThePinkSuperhero    April 10, 2010   NYC

    Thankfully, my ring is insured, so if I lost the stone, I'd replace it with a similar stone.

     
    19.
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    1,205 posts
    Bumble bee
    mdarrah    4/4/09   Los Angeles, CA

    This is why we have insurance!! I would replace it as is ASAP.

     
    20.
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    5,001 posts
    Bee Keeper
    msbuttons    May 30, 2010   Palm Harbor, FL

    Oh nooo that is so incredibly upsetting!  This is reminding me that I need to have the FI get my ring insured as soon as we get to VA!  We looked into having it insured in FL vs. VA, and for some strange reason, it is half the price in VA in comparison.  Don't know how that is...

     
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    chelseamorning    November 1, 2008   Washington, DC/Atlanta

    That's so sad! Poor grandma :(. I would replace it, but I would want it to be something that came from a sentimental place. If your grandpa is still alive, I would want the replacement stone to come from him, just like the first one did.

     
    22.
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    Helper bee
    LilMisPriss    August 8, 2009  

    I have a little of a 2 ct centerstone- and no matter if any of the diamonds of the center stone falls out its covered by the jewelers warranty- gotta love good jewelers

     
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    Sulli301    June 26, 2010   Michigan

    I have my insurance from the jewler and from my insurance agent. I am NOT letting this happen! :)

     
    24.
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    164 posts
    Blushing bee
    EngineerBride    October 31, 2009   Guilderland, NY

    Were there more than one diamond in the ring?  You said she lost the centerstone, so are there others?  Could she have something done so just the two are set on the ring?  I know it would be a different ring, though, so it may not be as meaningful.  That's a tough conundrum to be in.

     
    25.
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    Busy bee
    mascara      

    Oh my gosh, that would be so sad!!  I'm not sure what I would do...besides cry!

     
    26.
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    Busy bee
    Leafy    May 1, 2011  

    I know this may sound crazy but, maybe you and a bunch of your other family members could donate a little money each and get your Granny a new diamond? It doesn't have to be anything fancy- just a little something.

     
    27.
    Bee
    805 posts
    Busy bee
    thimble    October 2010   NYC/ Philly

    I've been dealing with this because I lost my ring 4 months ago. It took me this long to decide to get a new ring altogether and not the same setting i had before. The roughest part was that it was my grandmother's diamond. People keep telling me "it's just a thing, it can be replaced, and the symbolism remains," etc. but it's a bummer because it was, obviously, my own stupid fault. On the bright side, it's a funny story, because my grandmom lost her original ring too... so it wasn't even her original :)  Chin up, GranMaryJane. I say replace it if she wanted it to be an heirloom and if it was insured.

     
    28.
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    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    My mom kind of "lost" her original ring-- but really we're pretty sure it was stolen. She didn't realize it at first because she didn't usually wear it, she usually wore the 20th anniversary band that my dad got for her. She was still super upset when she realized it was gone. About 2 months before my parents' 29th anniversary I suggested to my dad that he replace her ring with her "dream" ring. They had put a down payment on a marquise ring when they found out she was pregnant and they had to get married FAST (the 70s, ya know), so they just got a tiny round stone that they could afford with the money already paid. I thought it'd be really sweet to get her a marquise solitaire and bring the whole thing full circle. 

    Well- he took the idea and rannnn with it. He decided to start shopping immediately because "who knows how long it could take" (lol) and he wasn't satisfied to get just a plain solitaire. He decided on a 3 stone oval ring-- nothing like her original ring or dream ring but super big and beautiful-- and had it bought before their 29th anniversary! So he just gave it to her for 29 because he couldn't possibly sit on that secret for a whole year. My parents are too cute. :)

     
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    Worker bee
    GingerRogers    July 31, 2010   Canada

    The warranty from our jeweler is amazing and am covered if ANYTHING happens to the stone over the next 7 years, but still got it insured anyways. I would just replace it with something similar. If I was able to knock out the stone in my ring now, I can't imagine how fast I could knock out a larger one!

     
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    3,805 posts
    Honey bee
    mrspaetz    July 4 2009   Singapore / California

    aww that's such a pity.

    my e-ring's center stone was the stone from his grandma's e-ring which she wore daily until her death a few years ago.

    that's one of the reasons why i don't wear my e-ring unless on super special occasions -- that, and also because i don't like bling/jewelry in general.

     

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