- 6 years ago
I havent posted on here since i got engaged 2 months ago and i officially have no where else to turn for advice so here it goes. I had wanted to have a short engagement like super short(3-4 months max…pref 2-3months even) and do whatever I could pull together in that time frame. So my parents agreed that that timing would not work for them since it would have landed in january or february and my dad has crazy work hours in january february and march so he told me that he wouldnt be able to enjoy the wedding(and hes paying for it). So anyways I was reallly bummed but I understand his concern. So my FH lives an hour away and i live with my parents(for 2 months now) and i have barely seen him, and when i do its very short lived(we usually get once a week but for the last month not even that.
What I have gotten done this far: i have a date set, venue booked for april 14th 2012 (and the deposit is 100% refundable)..I also sent out some save the dates about a month ago to some aunts and uncles(one of which had to rearrange a tournament is involved in to make it to my wedding). i have a dress that would be way too big for a small wedding(but i can still return it), i have an officiant, dj(havent paid yet though), and my bridesmaids have started buying their dresses and plane tickets.
My point: Im feeling really discouraged, my goal is to get married in a way that suites us, but i no longer feel the need for a larger & more tradiational wedding that up until a month ago, i had always wanted.
But given the state of things i now wish i had just planned a small ceremony, maybe out of state, in a scenic place, just immediate family, my 4 bridesmaids and his groomsmen(my vision is a january wedding in the mountains somewhere, outside and then have our honeymoon somewhere near the wedding in a cabin..). So i came up with this idea yesterday and since the wedding planning has been so painful and the waiting even worse, for something i dont even want anymore, I wish i could undo everything and do something simple so i would be happier and more importantly my Fh wouldnt be so frustrated with my complaining.
I really dont know how to deal with this stress and i am not someone that likes to change plans or disappoint anyone. I know it sounds like everything would be perfect if i just cancelled everything but i think im too cautious to do that, and whenever i ask my FH about what he would like to do instead he tells me he doesnt care(mostly because he know ive changed my mind so many times already so he cant care). So now it seems like all(which is to stick to the plan) or nothing(courthouse- since i dont think anyone would want to go along with my new plan).
Any advice, I hope im not the only one that has gone through this.