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That makes it tougher for you to have to give him all 3 languages! There's got to be at least one that he can take off of the list. Like the author says, you can be bilingual (I don't think he expected anyone to be trilingual, lol) but you must first give it a lot of thought to make sure one of your languages really doesn't top the other. It's like in Chapter 9 where Bob had trouble deciding between physical touch and words of affirmation. Maybe look back at those paragraphs about Bob (very beginning of Chapter 9) and ask the same kind of questions to your man to get him to figure it out?
I had trouble at first deciding if my primary language was acts of service, gifts, or words of affirmation. I've come to the conclusion that my primary language is acts of service, with gifts being secondary. I figured it out by looking at the ways I tried showing love towards my guy (before I knew he spoke a different love language) and the things that upset me when he didn't do them.
I had the same problem your husband does. I find it nearly impossible to pick just one, and extremely difficult to say that I don't care about any of them. I'd pick five if that were reasonable. But, I know the entire point of the exercise is to help FI identify what he can do to make me feel loved, and it isn't fair to say "Well, all of it, all the time." So we've had a lot of discussions to help identify exactly what is most important, and what hurts the most when it's missing.
kjpugs, try having your DH take this quiz to determine what his top love language is...
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/personal-profiles/?profiletype=husbands
My guy has those same three. Mine is touch. But he doesn't get that absent-minded cuddling while he's on his laptop, plus sex, is not quite sufficient to make me feel appreciated over a six month span (Sorry, he did give me a necklace when I'd been gone for two weeks, and a wilting bouquet when he inadvertently said I was fat.) Not a backrub, no unsolicited help in the kitchen, no putting aside time for the two of us to go do something together (we do mock-sword-fighting, dancing, hiking, etc, but I ALWAYS have to initiate, and even then he's rarely up for it), not a single compliment, and he only give gifts when he's lonely or when he's majorly upset me. I try to play up what he does right, but after six months with no intentional romantic gesture, it gets hard.
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We just started the love language book and LOVE IT! DH said he loves it, when he's done with each chapter it is like, wow this stuff is all common sense, but that he didn't realize before. We already have improved our relationship with a few chapters!
My love language is gifts and my secondary language is words of affirmation.
DH took it... 3 way exact tie between phsyical touch, quality time, and words of affirmation.
It's really hard to go through the book considering 3!!! I asked him to retake it but he said he really thought a lot about his answers and wouldn't change them.
Anyone have a similar situation?