- 4 months ago
- Wedding: October 2017
I am having some issues with my Maid of Honor (“MOH”) and would like some ideas on how to deal with them as I am all out of ideas myself! Before I get into the details of my MOH I want it to be known that I am having a destination wedding. My MOH and bridesmaids were thrilled to know they would be getting a wedding to attend and a vacation. So there was never any issues brought up to me when I told them over a year in advance. (August 2016. Wedding is October 2017)
She is my best friends we met in highschool (were 29 now) and really got close in the last 4-5 years. We always said we would be each other’s maid of honors if we ever got married.
So for the last few months my MOH has kept letting me know about how much money I am costing her and I should feel so special and grateful for that. Down to every last dollar.
She complained when she purchased her dress and rolled her eyes and complained when I didn’t get her favourite colour instead got my own. (I don’t think it’s asking too much?) She’s still complaing that I never went with her colours but instead stuck with what I loved. (5 months later)
I asked for her opinion on what she would like for shoes I gave her options and instead of saying anything she said “And how much is this going to cost me now?” I always said from the get go I would be purchasing these shoes. And they aren’t even expensive $30CAD
Just this past weekend she said in front of everyone that she isn’t even able to go back to her home town (Newfoundland) for home come year because I am getting married in Cuba and she can’t afford two trips so she’s missing out back home. She can’t afford to go more in the hole.
Now to yesterday I found out my company is all attending my wedding and my trip there and accommodations will be paid for by the office as well as my fiancé’s. So she got mad and said “Shut up, you’re telling me that I have to pay more for your wedding that you do?”
I told her that this isn’t the first or second time I’ve heard her tell me about money and I am starting to stress out about how bad I feel for doing this to her.
She got back to me and told me I have no right to feel bad about that or to stress out. Pretty much letting me know I should have no feelings about it. And once again told me “You should feel so special that I am willing to go into the hole for you!”
Has anyone had issues? I’d understand where she’s coming from if from the start she was uncertain but she was so excited! And she’s been on all-inclusive vacations before and knows how much they cost. So it wasn’t a surprise. I even booked at off season so it’s even cheaper for everyone.
One last thing, I said my company is paying for my way there and stay. However, there are wedding package, wedding favors, bridesmaids gifts, my gown. I am definitly not getting a free wedding. But I am not complaining either it’s what my Fiance and I want and we want it perfect for us.