Post # 1
So, there are four girls who are going to be in my wedding. There is really only one or two that I want to be MOH’s but I do NOT like giving my friends different titles. I don’t want them to feel bad and question our “level of friendship”.
Whether they say it’s okay, it’s still going to hurt their feelings if I don’t name them MOH’s. So, my question is:
Is it okay to have four Maids of Honor because I feel they all hold a special place with me and that I see them equally?
Post # 3
I was in a wedding in May where the bride didn’t choose a maid of honor, just had us all stand up as bridesmaids. Her sister stood closest to her during the ceremony and signed the marriage certificate. Another BM and I gave a speech. The same BM and I each organized a bachelorette party (she had 2).
This is probably the way I’d approach it if you don’t want to distinguish among your ladies. Saying that you have 4 MOHs sounds like a little much to be honest. Would your FI then have 4 best men?
Post # 4
No offense, but if your friends are going to question their level of friendship AFTER you’ve asked them to be in your bridal party but not in the role of MOH then they’re not real friends. Being asked to be a BM is a huge honour in itself.
Regardless of if you have 4 MOHs or 4 BMs you’re still going to have to play “favorites” in one way or another. Who’s going to stand next to you and hold your flowers at the alter, for instance? Another being who sits next to you at the head table or in what order are the speeches given? You may as well go ahead with naming the one or two that you feel worthy of being a MOH, because regardless of whether you do or not, they will have preferrential treatment over the other ladies in your party. Besides, I’d feel utterly silly telling people “yeah, I’m MOH #4 on the end” when it would be easier and less redundant to say “I was a BM. That’s me on the end”
Food for thought: If in the two that you’ve considered being MOHs one is married and one is not, you can ask one to be your maid of honour and the other your matron of honour.
Post # 5
I think it would be just fine if that’s what you want to do. To be perfectly honest though being in a bridal party is a huge honor…and when i was a bm for a good friend i never thought about not being her MOH.
Post # 6
I think instead of having 4 MOHs, I’d have 0 and have them all be bridesmaids. They are still all equal, so basically the same concept, but it sounds much better. Then divide the normal MOH duties among them.