- 4 years ago
So my Maid/Matron of Honor and other bridesmaids are from different facets of my life and live all over the map. From what I hear they seem to superficially get along, however when I talk to my Maid/Matron of Honor sometimes she lets me know what her actual impressions are. Since we are best friends I don’t mind her confiding in me about little small things that she doesn’t care for in my other bridesmaids, till now. Let’s call Maid/Matron of Honor Cathy and the other bridesmaid Laura. Cathy was telling me how Laura was very gung ho about getting dates and budgets, etc. nailed down for the bridal shower and bachelorette party. Basically Cathy was letting me know that Laura was being too over zealous and that she found it unnecessary and that she herself felt that they had time to get everything together. PAUSE.
I didnt say anything to Cathy, I just let her vent, but to be honest I actually agree with Laura. They do have a lot of time to get things together, the wedding isnt till April….however, my bridesmaids live in different states across the country, aren’t all that finacially stable, and obviously have lives outside of my wedding. I think Laura was gung ho because she is one of my really good friends and wants to have a nice shower/bachelorette for me and in order for her to do that she personally needs to plan way out in advance not just for financial reasons, but for logistical, i.e. when is everyone available reasons.
Cathy has a similar financial and logistical situation, and I found it disheartning that she thought that Laura was going about things too fast. Cathy, like Laura and the other bridesmaids have other things on their mind but I just didn’t appreciate her telling me that Laura was going too fast because in reality I think Laura has hit timing right on the head. Laura told me in another setting that Cathy doesnt say much when she forwards her ideas, budgets, etc.
I want to make sure my fsils are included in all of this somehow considering that they are not bm, as well as my jr. bridesmaid and mother. But my moh doesn’t follow my wishes. She doesnt include my jr. bridesmaid in dissemanation of info and has yet to call my mother or fsils. If for no reason other than to let my jr. bridesmaid’s mother aka my sister know how much she needs to put in. In general I find that my moh is doing a great job of being my best friend, but a so-so job of being the leader as moh. Which is totally out of character for her. IMO I think she really just doesn’t know what she is doing (I mean most people I would assume is winging it when they are bm and moh), but won’t admit that she is a little lost to me or to people that can help like my mom and other bridesmaids.
I agree with Laura, do I let Cathy know that?