- 5 years ago
- Wedding: July 2011
Ladies, I’m not in a good place right now.
Some of you have followed my previous threads and know that my husband and I are trying to work on our sex life because it has been severely diminished since I cannot use condoms. For those who don’t know- Condoms (non latex as well) give me horrible irratations and don’t allow me to have ANY pleasure in sex whatsoever.
Basically the only way we can have sex where we both enjoy it, is all natural. No condoms, lubricants etc. Well, that obviously cannot be our main choice because none of us want kids-ever. The two of us are young, 21 & 23 so most surgical options are out as every doctor we’ve found has said that we need to be 25 or older for the surgery. Because somehow we are old enough to HAVE kids but not old enough to decide that we don’t want them. I’m furious.
Our sex life (as with most couples) is important and something that has been lacking because it would be incredibly irresponsible to have sex without any method of protection since we don’t want any children at all.
This brings me to where I’m at now. I’ve tried all other birth control methods outside of the “Family Planning” method (The whole thing sounds much too confusing and would require several months of charting etc which I’m not interested in) and nothing has worked. Pills, Condoms, IUD’s, Etc. My doctor told me to try the NuvaRing since it has worked with women who get extreme nausea during the BC process- but I’ve taken it out after the first day.
Basically I put it in and about 2 hours after, I had a splitting headache. OK deal with it.
In combination with the headache I began to bleed VERY heavily. OK fine. Hang in there.
Then in the middle of the night I woke up screaming because I honest to god thought I was being stabbed to death on my left side. I ripped off my pajamas because I was so convinced my skin was splitting open from the inside out. Nothing there.
My husband stayed up with me while I sobbed and fought the urge to puke my brains out all over our bed. Bless my husband because he wanted me to take out the ring immediately but I knew this was pretty much our last option at fixing out sex life so I refused. Horrible idea.
About 30 minutes later I couldn’t walk or stand and my temperature spiked increasingly all while not being able to stop crying and biting my own hand from the pain on my left side. This was the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my life.
Finally my husband told me enough is enough and since he feared that I’d black out because of the pain he told me to remove it immediately. I went to the bathroom and tried to remove the ring but I couldn’t find it anywhere. Not to mention it was so painful to put any fingers inside (sorry TMI) and the pain made my legs shake uncontrolably to the point where I had to just sit on the bathroom floor and breathe. After a few moments I got up and told my husband I couldn’t find it and that we’d probably have to go to the ER.
My husband is such a sweetheart I can’t even believe him sometimes. He told me that HE would get it out (I was so grossed out since I’m on the heaviest day of my period 🙁 ). He proceeded to try but he told me that it was MAJORLY swollen inside and it barely allowed him to insert just one finger. While he was trying I felt dizzy and like I’d pass out but finally he was able to get through the swelling and pull it out.
I kid you not, about 45 minutes after the ring was removed I felt no more side pain and the nausea began to subside as if nothing had ever happened. Even my menstrual cramps went away.
I’m devastated. The ONLY thing that had a chance of working failed and now there is nothing left to try. I can’t have a sexual relationship with my husband and there isn’t a thing I can do about it anymore. I can’t stop crying and I feel like I’ve let him down even though he has told me about a million times today that we will get through this and it will be OK.
I don’t think it’s going to be ok..