(Closed) Major drama relationship- to invite my brothers girlfriend or not?

posted 5 years ago in Family
  • poll: Would you invite her?
    I read the post and yes I would still invite her : (14 votes)
    34 %
    I read the post and no I would not invite her : (21 votes)
    51 %
    I read the post and I'm still not sure : (6 votes)
    15 %
    I didn't read the post but I would invite her : (0 votes)
    I didn't read the post but wouldn't invite her : (0 votes)
    I didn't read the post and I don't know : (0 votes)
    Other : (0 votes)
    I like polls/I want to see the results : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1805 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    Oh geez … All people involved seem like mess! No offense lol is your brothers ex wife invited to the wedding? If yes, I say don’t invite the girlfriend. My cousins bf is a huge asshole so I only invited her and my aunt, she rsvpd no but honestly I’d rather not have drama on my wedding day! If her being there is gonna take away from your day I say skip her!

    Post # 4
    Member
    90 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Personally I wouldn’t invite her, you could always use the married, engaged or living together rule for +1s as a reason not to invite her.I think it would risk too much drama, and she’s obviously not serious about your brother. How do you feel about it though? Could you just say there’s no room on the guest list?

    Post # 5
    Member
    3755 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I think you just have to give him a +1 and hope and pray she is not in the picture when the wedding rolls around 🙁 

    Post # 6
    Member
    751 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    I say not to invite her, that is not someone I would want at my wedding. Just not ok.

    Post # 7
    Member
    6015 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I read the post and I’m not sure.  He left his wife for this chick, do you think he’ll post at your wedding if you don’t invite her? 

    That said I wouldn’t invite either one of them personally, they broke up two marriages and apparently they think it’s a joke, so I’m not sure I would want them there.

     

    Post # 8
    Member
    2425 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I read the post. I think if you are giving everyone a plus one you have to invite her. It will just cause MORE drama if you don’t, so don’t feed the monster. It’s your brother’s life, if he chooses to chase after someone like her that is his problem, but you shouldn’t use your wedding to make a stand about how you judge his personal life to be. Just don’t have her be included in family pictures, but I would let her attend.

    I had nowhere near this much drama, but for instance, my sister and MOH is young, and she always has a boy tagging along. I would have preferred she didn’t bring anyone to my wedding because I don’t see her current boyfriend as permanent or serious, but she thinks he is and it would have caused a huge ordeal if I didn’t let him come when I gave others plus ones. I didn’t have him in family pictures, so if/when they break up that won’t be an issue.

    Post # 10
    Member
    6207 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

    I think you just have to invite him with a +1, and it will probably be her. I would warn your brother that you don’t want any drama at the wedding, though

    Post # 11
    Member
    642 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    You have to invite her.  She is your brothers “gf” and it would strictly be for his sake.  Dont invite her kids though.  I wouldnt…. I dont think

    Post # 12
    Member
    12250 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I would give him a +1, since everyone is getting one, and hopefully she doesn’t show (once again) !

    Post # 13
    Member
    2866 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    That’s his girlfriend regardless of how you feel about her. You do the right thing and invite or YOU will be the one who looks bad 

    Post # 14
    Member
    1734 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Give him a plus one, assign your family to defuse any drama that happens, and figure that you won’t even see them that much on the day.

    Also: BIG HUGS to you, lady — sibling drama is the freaking worst. I won’t get into it, but I also had to navigate some sib drama surrounding the day. The good thing was that my parents had my back 100%, and I knew it would be fine.

    Post # 15
    Member
    147 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    It’s your brother and if everyone else get a +1 than I think he should be able to also. If none of the family has met her yet, you don’t know how they will act around others. If she hasn’t met the family because she feels awkward maybe she won’t even show up with him at your wedding. You are his family. I think he informs you the issues they have because you are family and thats what we do. We confide in people close to us. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    293 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I have the exact same thing with my brothers GF, military & all. He was married with one son, then they got divorced because my exSIL was a freak, but I’m kind of biased. ANyways, he’s dating the same girl he dated throughout hs (he’s 26) and she is a nightmare!!!!!!!! Trashy, foul mouthed, a drunk, just gross. Everytime he brings her around, everyone goes to another room because we can’t stand her. My mom confronted him about her and he said we are all making things up. They say disgusting things on fb to each other and post gross pictures, and I know my ex SIL can see it all..and I JUST know she is going to take it all to court.

    Well for Christmas i was in amarillo with my FI and his family & my brother calls me at 2am asking me to come to HOUSTON to pick him up because he got in a BAR FIGHT. I called my dad and come to find out (per my brother) his awful GF told some guy that my brother beats her!!!!! So this guy came to the bar and beat the crap out of my brother and my brother is a big guy. I felt terrible and my brother said he was done with this girl & moved back home…for 3 days… My dad went to his gf’s apartment and got all of his things, but then my brother turned right around and moved back in with her. She told someone my brother BEATS her! And he took her back, I don’t understand it. Anyways- he’s the same way, saying everyone is going to love her…But I don’t want her getting trashed at the wedding and causing a scene like I know she will. So.. I’m NOT inviting her. 🙂

     

    Hope this helps, just know that I am in the exact same boat!

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