Post # 1
i’m somewhat heartened to see that dress anxiety is a commonplace issue, but wonder if i should actually look at other gowns. background: i have purchased a lovely lazaro gown at a sweet discount, which has now been altered and customized with some details, but something about it is not sitting right with me. even though i’ve now gone for a fitting five times at the seamstress’ request (!), i still find myself not feeling completely comfortable. my bust is not fitting inside the dress very well, despite the (talented) seamstress’ attempts, and there is something worse still – an everpresent stomach bump that seems to be caught in every photograph taken of the gown. this is especially upsetting since i have never really thought i had much of a stomach, and yet, the satin finish of the dress seems to sort of grab attention in that place, which makes me insecure. as i do not plan to become anorexic prior to my wedding day, and spanx tend to make me look bigger rather than smaller, this is a major concern.
my mother thinks that i am being hyper paranoid about this issue, but my father looked at a photo of me in the dress, pointed at my tummy, and said “is that a bustle?” obviously other people notice this…and have no tact, and that was my DAD! ha.
another point to mention is that i had always envisioned wearing a lace dress, but was talked into this one by the salesperson. although i’ve already spent a pretty penny on alterations and this dress, is it worth looking for another, selling this one, and just eating the loss so i can feel like i don’t need to diet for the next three months?
please advise if you can!
Post # 3
I think that if you feel uncomfortable in this dress, it will continue to bother you. If you have the funds and the time, I’d say it’s perfectly fine to check out lace dresses and see if you can find the dress that you LOVE. If you do decide to keep this one, talk to your photographer and he or she will be able to help you feel more comfortable.
It’s an absolutely beautiful dress, but if you don’t feel beautiful in it the point is moot.
Don’t worry, this is going to work out 🙂
Post # 4
I do see the bump, since you pointed it out. I don’t know if I would have noticed it if not though. If you are really uncomfortable, and don’t love your dress, maybe you should look for another one that you absolutely feel right about. You could always try to sell yours. Have you looked at those really long bras? They come down to like your hips and help hold your stomach in? That might be a good solution.
Post # 5
Hmmm, I can see what you’re saying. Unfortunately, there does appear to be a tummy bump, and I had the exact same problem with any dress with a satiny-sheen; although I don’t HAVE a bump, the light catches the material and gives it that impression.
So, I agree with MissHelen that if you feel uncomfortable in it now, you will probably feel the same way about it on your wedding day. If it’s in your budget to get a second dress and you think that this will make you feel better, then by all means.
That being said, I have seen many beautiful brides with this “bump” (due to the fabric), and it didn’t make her look any less beautiful. And, even still, I think that you look absolutely gorgeous in the dress.
Post # 6
If this dress does not sing to you meaning make you feel totally happy than I would say sell it and buy a new one. You may be able to recoup some of the expenses. By the way I think the dress looks beautiful but I do see a tiny lil stomach bump but I mean tiny! But if it makes you feel uncomfortable than that’s all that matters. Do you have other pix at different angles you can post?
Post # 7
I think most dresses of that style are going to sit like that. Some angles and lighting it will look better in though. Think about where your photographs will be taken (indoors, outdoors, etc).
Have you tried on spanx or something else?
I personally would try to make it work since my mom would kill me if I had to back out of my dress, but if it REALLY bothers you and you can sell it and find something else in the meantime, then go for it!
Post # 8
When I was trying on dresses some made me look like I had that bump too while others didnt..my mom was so honest (it was annoying!) and would not let me even like the dress if it even hinted at a tummy…now I do have a bit of a tummy but the dress I bought smoothes it out perfectly….ANYWAY I do think you should look into some spanx satin is a very unforgiving material I do love the dress and I think you look AMAZING in it but you need to feel amazing and not regret your choice when you look at your pictures years down the road
Post # 9
If you are against wearing spanx and it will make you paranoid leading up to the wedding and on the wedding day, I think you should continue to look at dresses. You will either find that you love your dress, or that you feel better in another dress.
The dress is beautiful and classic, though. Another option would be to have the seamstress add another lining in the tummy area. Or maybe wear a long line bra.
Post # 10
If you’re not comfortable, then I suggest getting another dress. The dress is really beautiful though and I considered buying a similar dress but the owner of the store where I bought my dress talked me out it because of the exact same reason you just mentioned. I am skinny as well but somehow, the dress makes me look like I have a bump.
At the end of the day, all you have to show for the wedding are your pictures and if you look like you have a bump, then I am not sure if you will be happy with that.
Post # 11
thanks so much for the comments ladies! i so appreciate it. i have been suppressing this feeling for a while and it feels good to express it. it also makes me feel better that many of you have experienced this bulge phenomenon.
i think one reason i’m so afraid to change it up is my mother has always been heavy, and is constantly calling me a “stick,” “too skinny,” etc. she will DEFINITELY freak out if i spend money on another dress after alterations and everything. that said, i think what most of you are saying about not feeling content with the photos and not feeling beautiful on the day might have to override this. mother-daughter relationships – always a blast, no?
and it’s definitely stupid to worry about the seamstress’ feelings right?! she is constantly saying you look great, don’t lose weight, girls always get too skinny, blah blah blah.
here are two more (iphone, so terrible but still) pictures. i love the back, but the tummy bulge is just eating at me.
Post # 12
If I’m not happy with what I’m wearing, you can see it all over my face. And you don’t want that to happen on your wedding.
If you aren’t comfortable in your dress and you’re not happy with your dress, then find something that does make you happy.
Post # 13
It’s gorgeous! All you need is a decent corset! I think you look amazing in that dress!
BUT that is what I think. you have to act on what YOU think.
Good luck. I’m voting you keep the dress and go get some good spanx and corset!
Post # 14
Your dress is really pretty and I don’t think the bump is that noticable. I would exhaust all other options to see if there is anything you can do to minimize it without going out and buying a whole new dress. Maybe the right undergarment will help.
Post # 15
thanks again for all the nice comments. it is good to get this out there! and i thought no one would respond – this is a great site!
unfortunately, i’ve already tried the whole spanx thing, and it doesn’t do anything for the tummy bump. i SO wish it did, because there is so much about this dress that i 100% adore, and there’d be the added benefit of not getting chewed out by mom/dad/fiance/seamstress for frivolous spending/vanity. the idea of fretting over this for the next three months is not a pleasant one, though.
also, am i nuts or don’t “bumps” look better in lace or fabric other than satin?
Post # 16
I love love love the back! I agree with Tulip.