Post # 1
So, I’m seriously in need of advice here. My fiance has 2 brothers and 2 sisters. One of his sisters has a 21 year old daughter (my fiance’s niece) who has a boyfriend. During the building of the invitation list it was decided that due to the limitations that we had that we would only give an "and guest" invitation to members of the wedding party.
Two days ago, 4 days before my wedding, I get a text message from the niece who said "just checking in to make sure that ** is invited to the wedding". I wrote her back and said "actually, he isn’t. we are limited in our numbers". She never wrote me back but I found out from my fiance’s other sister that his niece and her mom had gone to the other sister’s house and told her about the situation. The other sister explained that it was not a requirement for us to invite him and that if he wasn’t on the invitation then they should’ve gotten the answer to whether the boyfriend was invited or not from that. Well, they didn’t and they are VERY mad about the situation to the point where the niece has said that she will not come to the wedding without her boyfriend.
So, my fiance’s sister and niece are now very mad at me. My fiance’s mother and father don’t want the boyfriend there either because none of the rest of the family likes the boyfriend.
So, what do I do? Suck it up and forget about it? Call her and tell her that if it makes her happy then bring the boyfriend? Why should I be worried about other people’s issues like this when I have enough stress going on in my life?
What should I do?
Post # 3
I would suck it up and forget about it! He wasn’t invited, the niece’s aunt explained the situation to her and she still won’t let it go. I think the niece is being quite immature. If you established a guest list rule in reference to "plus one" then stick with it. Don’t let one person ruin your big day!
Post # 4
Is the niece living with her boyfriend? How long have they been together?
Post # 5
You are about to be family. This boyfriend of the 21-year-old isn’t. I wouldn’t fret about it. You are following etiquette….and honestly, people are a little selfish when it comes to weddings. They should never assume that they can bring a date, unless noted. The bride and groom have a budget, and will allow for what they can afford. period.
You’ve already set your limits, so do not budge!! From how it sounds, you’ve handled the situation tactfully thus far.
Post # 6
No, the niece is still in college and does not live with her boyfriend. I’m so surprised that her mom is eating up and participating in making this situation so dramatic. I would think that a mother would try to get her daughter over the situation and tell her that she can be without the boyfriend for 3 hours of her life.
Post # 7
I would suck it up and forget it, this will pass…its something so stupid and petty to be upset about! girl needs to chill!
Post # 8
Def suck it up, it will pass. She is in college, its a family event, she does not NEED her bf there! If they were enagged it would be one thing, but they arent. And a lot of college relationships dont last.
Post # 9
Forget about it, you have enough on your plate. If you give in on this, they’ll run you over with the next thing. Good luck!
Post # 10
I’m sorry to hear all this drama is happening over such a trivial thing. I say do NOT invite the neice’s bf. If the neice decides not to come that’s her perogative…your fi’s family understands so that should be that.