(Closed) Mama Bees… I need some advice

posted 10 years ago in Beehive
Post # 3
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

ok, so i’ve never had kids, so take this with a grain of salt, but i was around for my mom’s five pregnancies after me… (i have four younger brothers and my mom miscarried a baby girl) and i think if they’re going to be pregnant, 6.5 months is an okay time. they won’t be nauseous, but they won’t have hit the worst of the tired-ness that comes around 7/8/9 months…

my advice is just don’t worry about it. once their pregnancies progress, they’ll know how it’s hitting them, and (hopefully) they’ll be honest with you if adjustments need to be made. don’t stress! just be happy for them. 🙂

Post # 4
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2008

well as long as she feels capable of doing the job it should be fine- you can politely ask them if they still feel up to doing your wedding given that she will be X months pregnant or whatever. . . and that you would not mind if they preferred her resting. Otherwise it is fine I think

Post # 5
Member
1238 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

As a teacher in a school with 8 pregnant woman I can say without a doubt that most people can work all the way up to their 8th month of pregancy.  Teaching requires them to be on their feet all day and full of life — and they rock!  Relax, they’ll do fine.

My MOH will be 5 1/2 months prego fo my weding.  It was fun having her try on bm dresses with the "tummy bump" under them!

Post # 6
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: December 1969

though i understand your concerns, i don’t think you should worry about this at all.  at 6.5 months, pregnant women can still function somewhat normally.  try to be sensitive to them as they probably didn’t plan for this. 

to be honest, as much as it is OUR BIG DAY, we brides need to sometimes realize that the world doesn’t stop just for us and our weddings.  just be happy for them!  all will turn out well in the end!

Post # 7
Member
2293 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

Most women work up until just before their delivery date, in order to try to save their maternity leave for after the baby is born.  My sister, who leads a team of personnel who do air monitoring for biological contaminants all over the country, was still traveling at a schedule that had her in three time zones over the course of most weeks up until 30 days before delivery.  At 6 months, she road her bicycle in a half-century (50-mile) road race.  I don’t think you need to worry about your photographer still being able to spend 6 – 7 hours handling a camera.  Unless she has some kind of serious problems, it should be just fine.  And really, anybody’s photographer could come down with the flu, get in a car wreck, break their leg skiing…  If your photographer is a reasonably healthy woman to start out with, you should have no more reason to worry than anybody else.

Post # 8
Member
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

please dont stress yourself out!!

sounds like you’re a bit bummed by the pregnancy of your friend???  let it go – focus on what’s going to make you a better wife; learn ways to communicate better with your (future) husband…

as brides-to-be we sometimes get lost in the deets of the day and "forget" that the most important thing is what happens AFTER the big day…

Post # 9
Member
24 posts
Newbee

I agree with Anti-Zilla  ( right above me)

Post # 10
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Hey, I’m a mom to an eight month old baby boy, and am planning my wedding. I’m a stay at home mom right now, but used to work at an afterschool/summer camp program at the local elementary school. Aka lots of high energy kids all around. Anyway I worked up until 2 days before I went into labor, and felt great the whole time. I walked probably at least a mile everyday, swam, played kickball, etc. Of course I never did anything that could have harmed me or my baby. We also had just bought our first house when I was eight months along, and I painted everyroom, and scrubbed down floors, restained the wood floors, etc. You would be surprised what pregnant (even eight or nine month pregnant) woman can do. I guess if I could do everything that I did, then your girls should be able to photograph, or stand up at your wedding no problem, unless of course they should need to be on bed rest would be the only thing. I can understand your MOH not going to vegas, as she wouldn’t have to drink, but second hand smoke in a lot of bars is not good for you while pregnant (well anytime really). So anyway, don’t worry so much, everything will be perfect! 

Post # 11
Member
1458 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

Pregnant doesn’t mean disabled and i know you’re not saying that but really they will be fine. Unless they have a high risk pregnancy and are required to be in bed, they will be able to stand in front of group in church, function a camera, walk and be functionalable for several hours, and at worst be a little tired and hungry faster thn others.

To be safe though – I would double check with the photog that he has a back up assistant if his wife is unable to make it. If he doens’t have that in the contract I would have him put it in asap. Being pregnant can be unpredictable and it’s good to have the back up. But really, I wouldn’t worry. You can ask and talk to your BM about this but it’s good to cover it professionally with the photog.

And just a little side note – a personal story. When I was pregnant (4.5 months) I attended my daughters fathers, sisters (you follow all that? LOL) wedding. All night, my boyfriend was dancing with another girl – she actually said to me "Thanks for letting me borrow your boyfriend, I know in your condition you can’t dance"

I was raging mad. Not that she was dancing with him because she was a friend of ours…but that You coulnd’t even tell I was pregnant in the first place and my legs weren’t broken – I was pregnant!. I didn’t want to be treated like a fragile dollie, I wanted to be treated like the person I am.  Everyone just assumed I coulnd’t dance because I was pregnant. Geeze – my FSIL went sky diving up until 2 months pregnant (she a pro BTW – not suggested by any means….)

Just make sure your BM knows she can come to you if she’s feeling a bit tired. This is your day but you can’t stop everyones life around it.

Just roll with it, soon it won’t really seem like it’s that big a deal at all.

Post # 12
Member
105 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2008

At my sister-in-law’s shower she had a BM that was 4-5 months pregnant and went to vegas with us. She danced all night and was such a trooper!

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