Post # 1
it hurts to READ them. Not trying to spark controversy here, but for instance, with the cheating posts or the incredibly-effed-up-relationship posts… I feel for these women so badly (and in some cases the people in these women’s lives), but it also hurts ME to read. Like, I can’t imagine ever ever EVER going through anything like that with my FI, can’t imagine either one of us cheating on the other ever… and if it ever did happen, I can’t imagine how much it would HURT. But from all these posts, it seems like it’s more common place than I think.
My sympathies to anyone affected by it. Does it hurt anyone else to read those kinds of posts?
Post # 3
It doesn’t hurt me to read the posts but that doesn’t mean that I don’t feel bad for the victims. It’s different when the parties involved are complete strangers.
Post # 4
I’ll admit, I’m kind of getting desensitized to them because there have been so many lately and a lot of them strike me as fakes who are just jumping on the cheating bandwagon to mess with people.
If they’re not mainly trolls, then relationships and marriages these days are getting way more effed up than I thought. I feel sorry for my future children if that’s what they have to look forward to.
Post # 5
I wouldn’t say it hurts…. sickens is a better word for it I think.
Post # 6
@UpstateCait: yeah I agree with this – I feel bad (depending on the situation or the poster) but don’t feel gut-wrenching upset. Unless it’s a poster that I feel like I kind of “know,” in which case I do feel much worse.
Post # 7
@cyndistar3: I agree with you it sickens me more than anything….
Post # 8
It does hurt me when people suspect, or know that their fiances/husbands have cheated on them but yet they don’t want to leave the relationship. It’s like they come on here to get advice but then don’t listen to what people are saying.
Post # 9
@BeSeeingYou: I’m the same way. I find it harder when people post about messed up relationships, ask for attention and advice, and then go back to the way they were. I know it takes a lot of courage to make big changes, but it’s still frustrating.
Post # 10
Honestly, I find all the cheating posts pretty suspect. All of a sudden there are non stop posts by new members on a wedding forum? Why? Aren’t there a billion infidelity forums out there to join? Why are you seeking advice from mainly engaged women? The whole thing is just weird.
Not that I don’t feel bad if they are legit posters, just saying, it’s odd.
Post # 11
I just don’t get it, I’m going through the same thing with one of my friends right now.
She was engaged, then her fiance called off the wedding (8 months out), then they decided to get back together but start fresh, so right now they’re not engaged, but still planning the wedding for the same date…I just don’t get it! One day he acts like he’s committed and the next day he acts like he could care less, but yet she still wants to marry him!
With me and my fiance nothing has ever felt more right. I don’t know why you would want to vow to spend the rest of your life with someone who doesn’t show you that they definitely want to spend the rest of their life with you. </rant>
Post # 12
@Ayslinn87:It doesn’t hurt me because I don’t know these people. Not to sound too harsh but when I read them I can’t help but this these people are completely and utterly ridiculous and stupid. It’s usually a clear decision what these women/men need to do and it’s get out of the relationship and start to move on, but as we know 9 times out of 10 they go back to the way things were and wonder “WHY ME!” when it their significant other turns around and cheats of them again. I have no sympathy for cheaters or those who do nothing about it.
Post # 13
@KatyElle: Agreed. I think it’s awfully suspicious that there’s a huge wave of these posts all of a sudden.
Post # 14
I third the suspect thing. I mean, if I was going to post about infidelity it probably wouldn’t be on the bee- if it was, I would use my real username.
Post # 15
They hurt me to read them so I rarely do… I went through that with my ex FI… reading the cheater posts just take me back to a time I’d rather forget. =(
Post # 16
I understand what you mean about the effed up relationship posts.
It’s difficult to read about what goes on in some relationships knowing that you can’t really do anything to help or convince a person that she’s entitled to better treatment, respect or even basic courtesy from a romantic partner.