- 3 years ago
- Wedding: June 2013
I love my DH very much. He is a good man with good values.
We got married on June 28 and it was the greatest day ever! Both of us had good paying jobs and plans to start a family. We even started talking about TTC. This is how I thought our first year of marriage would go:
We both work hard to save and pay down debt, with an eminent pregnancy that could happen at any time. We would buy our first home at the end of this first year, maybe sooner.
That was the plan.
A week to 2 weeks ago, DH finally admits how unhappy his job makes him and tells me he wants to leave. I gave him my blessing to quit his job – We agreed he would give notice.
Sure the job pays as well as mine, but he is unhappy.
Money will always be tight, and we can adjust.
When your money is gone, you are simply out of money. But your time, there is no getting that back. And I don’t think a few extra bucks is worth the emotional turmoil. I have worked in this environment before and it is just not worth it. I like to think that he would support me too if I was that unhappy with my job situation. I want him to have something that will last, that he can be content with.
So I have decided to try my best to be supportive instead of resentful, which is harder than I thought – but I am still trying my best to be a good wife, he needs me right now.
The thing is… it hasn’t started very well…
At first he just wanted to quit, no notice, nothing. I had to coax him into honoring what we had agreed on, that he would give proper notice. So he gave notice – this would also give him time to get re-imbursed for all of his prescriptions which work covered (mostly).
Last week I was travelling for work – he called in sick on Thursday AND Friday, a big no-no because he had already gotten a talking to for doing it too much.
Yesterday, he goes in and is sent home right away. They ”moved up” his resignation date so they aren’t exactly saying he ”got fired”. Well goodbye few hundred dollars of re-imbursment I guess. Goodbye adjustment period for me. Not even sure how his one ”good” reference form there will go… Not even sure if that reference is high-ranked…
I originally thought he would search for a new job right away… Now he wants to apply for EI because he is depressed. Not sure if that will fly…
He is also talking seriously about going back to school and becoming an electricican. A course that takes 2-3 years. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s a GREAT idea, but that means I will have to support both of us during that time when I thought I would be a new mom… I really do think that his getting a degree is great, BUT I wish he wouldn’t have decided to do this right after we got married, not to mention leaving his job so abruptly… I barely got a chance to adjust to the idea and the budget… Right now we are officially a one income home… I need stability and have no idea what our life is looking like for the next few years now… The program he is interested in already started this fall and is waitlisted for winter… Which means it might be a FULL YEAR before he even starts…
I feel a lot of pressure to be the bread winner now. I like my job, it is the job I have liked the most, but I’d be lying if I didn’t feel some kind of pressure now.
– It’s all on me now… –
I feel angry that we are in this position…
This is mostly a vent, but could use any words of inspiration…