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Married Bees, If you had it to do all over....

posted 1 year ago in Newlyweds
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    1.
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    Buzzing bee
    Ella1978    June 19, 2010   Cleveland, Ohio

    What would you change?

    I'm not talking about big things - like the groom :) ha!  Kidding.. I just felt about 2 months out that I wish there were a few things I could change, but it was too late to do so... but I had a hard time dealing with the fact that we just got to plan this amazing party ONCE!

    If it weren't for my hubby falling madly inlove with his black pinstripe tuxes, I probably would have gone with a "mocha" color tux.  I would have gone more chic rustic theme - light brown, tan, light green & Ivory.  Would have used lace & birch tree bark.  I would have incorporated mason jars & moss (the hubby and I LOVE moss).

    One of the elements that I loved the most was something that I threw together in the last minute. I had clear cylinder vases & floating white candles.  In the water I put long dried grass that I got at Pat Catan's (craft store).  I pre-wet it & wrapped it around a toilet paper container so that it dried in a spiral.  Then when it rehydrated it would expand to fill the vase.  It was also apparently dyed green, because it turned the water a light green.  Those looked amazing on the head table, and I would have done them with two different height vases with submerged flowers in one of the other ones & something else in the third.  The looked beautiful & I hope that my photographer got an image.

    I would have focused on one really amazing signature drink.  I would have stuck to my guns & put sticks w/ rock candy in the champagne for the toasts.

    Clearly I would have selected a different cake lady.. ahem... and proabably gone with a little more "rustic" vibe on the cake, than the more modern one we went with.  I would have made sure there was a fun sparkler moment in the evening & had an after party with smores!

    That's what I have for now.. what about you married girls.. anything you wish you could go back and tweek now that things are said and done?

     
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    Helper bee
    Superstitions    July 25, 2009   TX

    I wish we would have made our own cupcakes like I originally wanted. We ended up hiring a bakery because there wasn't enough time, but they weren't anything like what I wanted. I hated that there were tuxedo cupcakes. I don't like them, even mentioned this, but they made them anyway. They tasted great though, so there was a good side.

    I would have been more insistent on keeping my music. I had a certain song in mind for the recessional, but changed it because of complaints from my parents. I still regret it; the moment wasn't the same (and I loved the song that replaced it) and it just didn't do it for me. Also, some songs ended up not getting played. The DJ would start to play some of these, and then the song would be changed immediately. I also wouldn't have had a father/daughter dance.

    I also would have insisted on walking myself down the aisle. There are absolutely no pictures of me smiling coming down the aisle and I hate it.

    There was also drama about the reception ending early, because some people wanted to socialize more. I wish we would have known about this, because we would have seen if there was some way to have made it work out. We had a fake exit for the cameras, so it would have been doable.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    vintage2010    April 10, 2010  

    I loved my wedding and would have changed just a few things.

    I would have made the break music for the band. I emailed them a list of songs to play on break and they downloaded them onto a laptop.  Some songs were cut short and had we made a cd we would've known this and fixed it.

    I would have rented my chairs and dinnerware from another rental company.  Our rental company is claiming we damaged chairs and the dinnerware was returned dirty.  They weren't we even have the venue backing us on that.  But who would've known they were going to be this way post-event.

     

    I wish I would have drank one of our special drinks we had made up. In fact I wish I would have had a least one drink besides the champagne toast.

    Other then that I enjoyed everything

     
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    Buzzing bee
    Ella1978    June 19, 2010   Cleveland, Ohio

    Vintage - I was so worried about having to pee in my dress, that I didn't really drink much of anything!  We sweat buckets, so I drank a bottle of water, i had the champange toast and one other drink & didn't pee till I took the dress off at 1:30am!

    Superstitious, at least the cupcakes tasted good!  There were a couple DIY projects that I nixed too & they would have been beautiful - I wish I had gone thru with them!

     

     
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    Helper bee
    morgan_e_johnson    June 19 2010   chicago

    Most of all I loved having my family and friends all in one place..

     

    however..the DJ lost our entire song list..so the music was only so so..and old people ish

    I felt like I was being pulled in so many different directions and didn't have that much time to acutally party

    couldn't drink b/c I wouldn't have been able to pee

    Didn't like the way the cake looked

    forgot to have the nighty and other esentials delivered to the room so I had to sit there in the lobby waiting for my family member to bring it to the hotel after the reception

    lol...all in all though..it didn't matter

     
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    Busy bee
    Amani    March 27, 2010  

    I'd elope.  Just kidding.  Well, sort of.

     
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    Busy bee
    brittanymichelle    June 5, 2010   Cheyenne, Wy

    i would definately elope, on a beach in the caribbean!!

     
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    Sugar bee
    2dBride    October 6, 2009   Washington, DC.

    @Ella1978 and morgan_e_johnson: Dang!  And here I even posted instructions for how to pee while wearing your dress!

     
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    Busy bee
    babymilka74    August 2010  

    I'm not even married yet but I think I would have had a destination wedding--that was my original idea. 

     
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    Buzzing bee
    Ella1978    June 19, 2010   Cleveland, Ohio

    2dbride..

    I wasn't cool with having assistance in the ladies room.  I had a fit and flare dress, which was tight thru the hips & had to wear shapewear to make sure my undies didn't show thru.. so lifting up a tight dress, then the shapeware, unsnapping it, pulling down panties and trying to pee just sounded waaaaay too daunting for me.

     

     
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    Buzzing bee
    Rgeddy    June 13, 2010   Raleigh, NC

    I would have changed some minor details - I wish we could have gotten more group shots (if it hadn't downpoured!).

    I wish my dress was pulled up half an inch - would have saved me tons of pain!

    I wish (again if it hadn't rained) the timing of the dinner/dancing etc would have been better.

    I wish I could have eaten more of the appetizers - they were GOODD!!

     
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    Honey bee
    Jenn23    April 17, 2010   Philly suburbs

    Wish I could have had more appetizers and dinner..hardly ate anything! Wish our photographer took more creative photos (but I didn't mention them beforehand so I can't fault him-the ones he took were amazing though!)..wish the reception lasted all night-went sooo fast! Wish my bustle held. It fell apart half-way thru the reception even with 7 ties! That's it. Everything else was great!

     
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    Helper bee
    bridget_124    July 24, 2010  

    I am not married yet, i have another 18 days to go.  So far what i would change would be, not having such a BIG wedding party.  WE have 8 attendants each and 2 ushers and it is a ton to keep up with.  Plus all the drama that comes along with it.  Plus one of the biggest things i've learned through this whole process, is how true some of my friends and family are and so untrue some of them are.  You learn a lot about your friends and family, when planning the wedding of your dreams.  I'm just excited to be marrying my best friend : )

     
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    Helper bee
    elaineathon    06/12/10   Washington, DC

    I wish I had tasted our passed appetizers during cocktail hour - we missed out on crabcakes! Also wish we had taken more wedding party pics, more photobooth pics, and pics of each table. Definitely would have assigned someone besides our DOC to handle the music as she couldn't figure out how to work the laptop and messed up our ceremony music multiple times. But in the end these are the little stories that you end up retelling and they get funnier over time!

     
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    Helper bee
    HereComesTheSun    March 6, 2010   Houston, TX

    I'd elope.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    Sunshine23    July 17, 2010   Canada

    Ohhh funny, I clicked on this post ready to answer "I'd elope" but I see other's have beat me to it!

    Wedding is a week from Saturday so right now I can't answer except for I wish we had had a DW and then had a nice reception with friends and family.

     
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    Bumble bee
    ms.pascua    June 25, 2010   Los Angeles, CA

    I would have held my shoulders back in more of the candids...formal pics, I look great, candids, I look like I'm slouching.

    Would have created a Facebook page rather than Twitter account for all the guests to "follow" us while we were in Disneyland (tix to Disneyland were our favors & we were trying to spend as much time with each group of guests as possible).

    Would have made sure that the bar we had at the welcome party after the church ceremony had beer...had well drinks, juice, & soda...but no beer.  So glad my cousin went to the store & snuck some in for my grandpa!

    Would have requested more umbrellas for our outdoor reception...Disney gave us more as soon as they could, but some guests had to suffer for about 45 minutes until they could.

    Would have changed into a different dress for the reception...it was HOT.

    Other than that, it could NOT have gone better!  Even those guests who were skeptics LOVED our wedding!  Everyone had a blast!

     
    18.
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    Helper bee
    Sarah71710    July 17, 2010   Colorado

    @ ms.pascua: thanks for the tip on putting my shoulders back!!!!! Will do on Saturday :).

     
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    Honey bee
    caszos    June 2010   Florida

    I was so happy that someone made us a plate of all the appetizers and had it sitting on our table when we finally got to sit down! 

    I wish my dress had been bustled shorter.

    I wish I had spent more time describing my cake to the bakery better.

     
    20.
    2,299 posts
    Buzzing bee
    bluespurrs    August 7, 2009   South-central PA, USA, Earth

    I would have waited longer to get married and hopefully been less stressed out about planning it.

     
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    Newbee
    wdwamanda    June 6, 2010   Northeast

    I would have been clearer about my own hopes and expectations for our wedding day, because partway through the process they got lost in the chaos. I wanted something very simple and inexpensive (that's just the sort of couple my husband and I are), and ended up with a wedding that cost much more than I was comfortable with (although our parents paid for it - but it still made me uncomfortable). Many of the things we argued over, such as whether or not to have real china at our reception ultimately didn't matter at all, and a month later I don't even remember what they looked like. I had a feeling it would be like that...I just wish I had stuck to my guns more about those things. :)

    I probably would have had a smaller wedding party too. I asked bridesmaids to be in my wedding party about a year before the big day, and let's face it...life changes a lot in a year. I ended up with 8 bridesmaids while we only had 80 guests, while I probably would have been fine with fewer.

    More than anything else, I regret stressing out SO MUCH over the wedding day. Sure, it's a great, once in a lifetime event, but ultimately I did not enjoy being engaged and I couldn't wait for it all to be over. I love being married now, and the wedding day was great, but it would have been wonderful no matter what because our guests were genuinely there to celebrate us.

    Oh, and I would have eaten more than a carrot and one piece of cantaloupe...I couldn't even make it to our buffet table, with everyone stopping me along the way!

    Good luck to you future brides...marriage is a wonderful thing...the wedding day is just the start!

     

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