Married Bees: What advice would you go back and give yourself during planning?

posted 3 years ago in Recaps
Post # 3
2124 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I would have told myself to start over, make a list of the things we definitely wanted and then I would have just stuck to that list. No revisions, no matter what. 

Post # 4
5460 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@excitedtobeMRSF:  I would have not taken offense to some of MIL’s suggestions.  At the time, she was a pain in my ass, but when it came down to it, she just wanted the wedding to be beautiful and classy because she loves her son and supports us as a couple.

I would have had a smaller wedding party.  We didn’t have any drama, hurt feelings, or disappointments, but it was a little overwhelming to coordinate everyone.  It turned out fine, but it would have been easier with fewer people.

I wouldn’t have changed anything else.  The food was great (and cheaper because we did a lunch meal instead of a dinner meal!) the music was fun, my dress was pretty, everyone had fun, and at the end of the day, I WAS MARRIED TO AN AMAZING PERSON!

Post # 5
3344 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

Don’t stress out so much, confirm the tux rentals with the shop a week before the wedding, overall spend less money, and get the dress fitted as close to the wedding as possible.

Post # 7
1491 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

1. If someone else is paying for something, then they get to have a say. My parents paid for the wedding but my DH did not like their opinions and I was caught in the middle.

2. Always focus on the positive! a lot of things don’t matter

3. I should have had someone do my hair professionally. It was SUPER windy (oceanside wedding) and my hair was a mess.


Lucky me I have two weddings to plan! One was family-only, one is for friends, so I’m doing the friends one very differently

Post # 8
2576 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

1. Make sure your corset back dress actually fits you properly and doesn’t slide down creating wardrobe malfunctions. 😉 There is a reason I am wearing a pashmina in my recap pics.

2. Have someone responsible for the gifts that guests will leave strewn about (we actually lost a gift (and maybe more) b/c the gifts were tossed in random corners and no one was keeping track of them.

3. Make sure your event coordinator actually stays for the cake-cutting portion, lol. Our EC left right after food was served so I had to get everyone together for cake-cutting. :/

4. Don’t immediately start drinking vodka tonics when you get there – there will be plenty of Veuve Cliquot champagne to suit your fancy – no reason to pile on the vodka.

5. Do not allow your DH to be in charge of dress code. If it were up to him, our witness would have worn old dirty pajama pants to our courthouse wedding and reception. We had a couple more underdressed guests b/c DH told them the wrong “code.”

ETA: Added #5.

Post # 9
1248 posts
Bumble bee

ooo commenting to follow! Hindsight is 20/20!

Post # 10
8282 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I would have really sat down and explored all of my options instead of just focusing on traditional wedding aspects. 

Post # 11
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

Definitely should have done more hors d’evoures!

Or not run late.

Or both!

Post # 12
3756 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Commenting to follow, getting down to the nitty gritty with 4.5 months left!!

Post # 13
472 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012


Seriously though, I would have gotten an event coordinator if I could do something different. Also, spend more time eating at the reception instead of feeling obligated to visit with the guests right away. 

Post # 14
3777 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

You know that tiny detail you’re freaking out about? NO ONE WILL NOTICE OR GIVE A DAMN!

Post # 15
204 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

1. I wouldn’t have rushed to buy my dress. I liked it, but it was a far cry from what I really wanted.

2. Don’t skip the alterations no matter how well the dress seems to fit off the rack!

3. leave money in the budget for professional hair and makeup.

4. research your photographer really, really, well before you commit.

Post # 16
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

1. have back up bridesmaids and groomsmen the day off! One groomsman dropped out right after the ceremony when we were supposed to go take more bridal party pictures… ‘sigh’… thank god DH’s brother filled in.

2. hire a day of coordinator to deal with set up and take down of self owned decor and return rental items. Oh and to deal with last minute seating changes due to unexpected ‘guests’ brought in by other guests without RSVPing… -_-


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