Weddingbee boards

First of all, congrats on getting married!

You should definitely let everyone know you are married.  You could either send out announcements, or I think including it on the save the dates, would work as well. 

I don't know exact wording to use on a save the date, but I would say something to the effect that you got married on XX and are now planning a vow renewal or marriage blessing and want to celebreate with everyone.  You could probably word it similar to a normal save thedate, but instead of saying it's for a wedding just say it's for a vow renewal.  Same would go for the actual invitation.

Unfortunately I'm not sure you should have any pre-wedding parties (bach. party or shower) since you are already married.  I think etiquette says you're not supposed to, but I personally think a shower would be ok.  But you'd have to decide if your guests would be okay with it. And I would keep it small.

I don't really know how they would announce you. I guess just leave out the part about being the new Mr. and Mrs.?

I think you can have a registry (because I'm sure people will ask what you need or want), but I wouldn't advertise it on a wedding website or anything.  If people ask then you can tell them.

I also wouldn't have a bridal party and do any of those traditional reception activites (bouquet toss, father-daughter dance, etc.)  I think a "first" dance would be okay though.  And no big-poofy wedding dress.  So basically a toned-down version of a wedding.

Anyway, I hope that was somewhat helpful.

My fiance and I are doing this (for timing/paperwork reasons, after he is back in the states we have 3months to get married and thats not enough time for everything we need to do wedding planning wise!).  The way we are doing it is the first wedding is just going to be a small thing with my siblings and parents, and its basically going to be the 'legal' wedding.  We will fill out all our paperwork and such afterwards, and then continue to plan what we consider our 'actual' wedding, also what we call our spiritual wedding.  Thats the big wedding with family and friends, and this is the wedding we are waiting for before the honeymoon and 'consummating' and all that.  The first one is for the legal process and the second one we consider our real one.  So you can do it the same way.  I'm sure your loved ones will understand and not even bat an eye!!

I have heard this situation called a "Celebration of Marriage" ceremony. Perhaps you could word the invitations like that? You could say something like "You are invited to celebrate the marriage of Mr. and Mrs.Soandso." I don't think the reception announcement is all that complicated. Just take out the NEW part and have the dj say "Everybody get on your feet and welcome Mr and Mrs Soandso!" I also believe marriage is way more than legalities. Many couples have gotten married legally but still don't see their union as fully valid until they are wed by the church. Some people do for reasons similar to yours. But I don't think that getting married beforehand makes you any less eligible to have a "real wedding". Don't get down on yourself! I see it this way... If Kim Kardashian can have a big ass wedding to celebrate a fake ass marriage, why can't you have a celebration of the real thing? It's a celebration with family and friends. Do what makes you happy. The day will be magical. You'll carry those memories for the rest of your life. If you don't do it, you'll probably always regret not doing it. But I promise that you will not get to the end of your life and say "Man, I really wish we hadn't had that ceremony!" It's your life and anyone who can't be supportive doesn't deserve a second thought. Tell the naysayers to blow their noses. They sound a little stuffy. :)