Post # 1
Hey bees! I have been with my SO for almost 6 years. We just got engaged this past July. Now that we’re [officially] planning on getting married, I’m started to panic when I see all of these married couples surrounding me getting divorced. I can HONESTLY say that I fall more and more in love with him every single day, and I cannot see my life without him, nor do I think divorce is EVER an option. But still, there’s that panic in me when i see so many married couples splitting. I never ever want to get a divorce. The thought alone break my heart.. Granted, I shouldn’t be “thinking” of divorce when I’m planning a marriage, but basically, my question to you all is how have you kept the spark in your marriage? How do you overcome obstacles after being married for over 5 years? Is it always as easy as it was in the beginning of your marriage, or does it get difficult over time? How do you handle marriage once kids are in the picture? Sex, etc.. ?
Share your wisdom with mee!!!!
This is a thread that I’m sure a lot of newly engaged bees will appreciate! So have fun with it!
Post # 3
obviously this doesn’t necessarily work for everybody, but I found this article a while ago:
Post # 4
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
This post is brilliant. I have been with my guy for over a decade and these are all things that we do a pretty good or really good job of NOT doing! 12 years and going strong 🙂
16 Ways I Blew My Marriage
Post # 5
@strawbs: I had read that before a few months ago.. Some points I loved, some, not so much lol.. But as you said, it could definitely be helpful for others! Thanks!
@lolot: Congrats on your 12 years! Thats what I want.. Plus 12 more, and 12 more, and 12 more, and 12 more This was a great article.. I liek that it was from a man’s perspective on his already failed marriage and how he should have handled things.
Post # 6
@strawbs: That article was so great. I’m not even in a relationship currently, but these are all things I am going to strive for in my next one. Thanks for sharing!
Post # 7
@FearLess: you’re welcome 🙂
Post # 8
I’m bumping this because there are very few bees who responded for themselves. I really would love to hear personal advice!! (I have seen that article before and love it though 🙂
Post # 9
@strawbs: I love this. So. Much.
Post # 10
We have been married for eight years and together for 11.5. We are still the most in love couple I know. One of our secrets is to consciencely choose to have grace and kindness for each other when the other one screws up. My husband knows that when he does something boneheaded like wreck my car or put red in with the whites, I will still treat him gently and with dignity, not scream and berate him. He does the same for me. We feel like we are each others safe place. Life is tough enough without the person you love making you feel stupid when you make mistakes.
Post # 11
Bumping cause I love it. 🙂
Post # 12
@MrsFuzzyFace: LOVE what you said! This is what we are working on. Unfortuately it is easier said than done. Not that we are constantly insulting eachother over dumb/stupid things. But sometimes things do tend to get out of hand. Sometimes we lose sight of the bigger picture.
Post # 13
@Sasha2011: I figured this out our first year of marriage. My husband was installing a ceiling fan while I watched. He was getting frustrated with some part that wouldnt go on, so he threw the wrench into the box. In his frustration he completely forgot that the light globe thing for the fan was still in the box. When we heard the glass shatter, he looked at me, fully expecting to have his tail chewed out. Instead, I said “well, it looks like we are going to need to order a replacement part. The look of relief of his face when I showed him grace taught me that I would rather be calm than have him feel horrible.
Post # 14
@strawbs: Love this article! Fiance and I just read it together and discussed the points raised. We found that the discussion may have been as helpful as the list itself.
@MrsFuzzyFace: This is a great story. I’ll have to try and remember it myself as a lesson in life.
Post # 15
I’ve been married for 27 years (mother-of-the-bride). The number one things is always treat each each other with respect and kindness – never take each other for granted. The second thing I would say is never give up – life and love come in waves, at times, it will be smoother sailing than other times, As well, love will wax and wane- hold on through these times and try to remember how you felt when you first loved each other and over the years your love will grow and deepen.
Post # 16
@MrsFuzzyFace: I love what you said..True..we are trying to get there but its hard..We both run out of patience..