Maybe I'm too anal, but not knowing is driving me crazy!

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
10219 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

In all honesty… NO ONE is going to be able to answer your Questions.

Communication is the cornerstone to a Healthy Relationship / Marriage… you guys need to be talking about this sort of stuff … and in a “natural” way… not in a forced way.  It should just be part of life as your relationship evolves / grows.

Have you actually sat him down and shared your LIFE PLAN & TIMELINE (stuff that explains WHERE YOU ARE in life and what your Personal Plans for the future are… with or without him)

Things like “I want to finish school by V, Get a good job by W, Engaged by X, Married by say Y, and have kids when I am Z years old”

You share your dreams & goals, and then you LISTEN very carefully what he replies with… BOTH to what he says, and what he doesn’t say (cause when it comes to Men… what they don’t say can be just as telling… or more so… than what they do say)

If you guys are going to succeed in your Relationship you need to talk easily & openly… and be on the same page !!

As for the Engaged to Married timeline… Lol, he isn’t the first guy who has had this idea… infact most guys don’t have a clue how long it takes to plan any sort of Wedding, let alone a Traditional Big White Pouffy Family one…

There are many a story about Guys who think you get Engaged, and then you get Married almost immediately thereafter.

Infact, guys who are head over heels in Love, often just want to “get it done” once they make up their mind that their GF is THE ONE.  And it is the women who have to slow them down… because there is so much to plan / do.

Men have no clue about Weddings in general.

Hope this helps,

PS… When it comes to ERings.  Another reason that communcation is soooo important.  Buying an ERing is a big deal for a couple.  And often times the two people are on different wave lengths.  And if it is a Diamond you want.. there is a lot to learn about Diamonds BEFORE you go out and buy one (Don’t go in to that from an uneducated POV… someone will get taken badly !!  Buying a Diamond is like buying a car… there are all sorts of people working on commission who will try to pull the wool over your eyes).  You should both do some homework… as there is a lot to know…


The 4 Traditional Cs for Diamonds = CUT (Quality) – COLOUR – CLARITY – and CARAT Size


And Decisions to be made…

(And men tend to know even less about Jewellery / Diamonds than women do… plus they tend to have no clue how much a Diamond costs… or what makes one more valuable from the next… hence why Jewellery Store Clerks LOVE having the uninformed guy to work with… they are putty in their hands when it comes to paying too much or dishing out more than they can afford)

I advise anyone looking for a Diamond to do a lot of research, and don’t rush into this.  Take their time.  The more you BOTH know the better off you’ll be.. because mistakes are costly… Jewellery is sort of like buying a car… once you drive it off the lot it loses a lot of value and be damn near impossible to return, exchange, or resell

If you are considering a Diamond you might want to check out the Blue Nile Website, they have an excellent Education Section =

If you are considering any other sort of Gemstone… you’ll find that there is much info to be discovered / gained by talking to the Bees that frequent the Ring Board here on WBee.


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