- 5 years ago
- Wedding: January 2017
Sometimes, when you just need a break from whatever has been hounding your mind, constantly bombarding yourself with that exact issue just may not be the best idea to help clear your mind, or ease your anxiety. I’ve looked at rings, dresses, and venues online, joined the Bee, an online wedding related community, and as of last week, even ordered myself a ring because I was feeling down and felt I deserved it. I’ve occasionally (ok, A LOT) snooped to see what my SO was looking at online, or checked his phone to see if he was talking to anyone about me. I think this obession has gone too far. I’ve told him how I feel, how I’m starting to have insecurities because of his fears of commitment and discussing the future. He’s honestly trying to learn how to communicate his feelings better, and I’m trying to keep mine slightly in reign, and realize what’s worth standing up for, and what is simply emotionally irrational and worth letting go. I’m glad that I’ve found this community, and that I’m not alone. But all the sad, negative posts of people (including myself) putting their lives on hold and feeling they cannot move forward during this “waiting period” is really starting to make me just plain worse. I’m making a vow to myself, for a minimum of one month (October) to relax and just breathe! I’m going to live my life. I will NOT snoop, I will not look at rings, dresses, etc. and get myself depressed, and I will give myself a break from wedding related websites and forums. For me, this constant self-pitty and torture has to stop. I know I will have my day…we all will! Before the craziness of wedding planning is upon me, I’m going to enjoy this calm. Thanks to all of you who have read my rants, and given insightful advice! Best wishes to all of you!