Mental health and pregnancy

posted 2 weeks ago in Pregnancy
Post # 2
Member
1274 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

v123a :  

Ok first of all you need to stop and you need to breathe.

This was a decision that you made so before all of these anxious feelings started, you were on board with it.

It honestly sounds like you are panicking. This is a very scary time, your life is about to change, and there are soooo many unknowns that go along with pregnancy. It’s understandable that you are having these feelings and it does NOT make you a bad person.

My advice is to breathe, and take it one day at a time. You can’t worry about future scans or your fear of breastfeeding, none of that is here yet so you are wasting your energy.

I’ll be honest, the thought of breast feeding grossed me out. It ended up coming naturally to me and I never felt grossed out, I breastfed for a year. So those thoughts and fears CAN change. And if they don’t, you formula feed. As long as your baby is fed, you will be ok.

Hugs bee, you will get through this. One day at a time, and go easy on yourself.

Post # 3
Member
223 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

This is completely normal. It is very normal to feel anxious about your pregnancy and caring for your baby, and also very normal to get irritated at people for persistently commenting on your pregnancy. Have you mentioned your concerns to your doctor? There are lots of brands of anti-anxiety medication that are safe to use while pregnant. I’m sure they can offer a recommendation if you would like to consider that route. 

And it’s okay not to breastfeed. That’s not a decision you need to make right now, but if you decide to go the formula route, that’s okay, too. You know what’s most important? A healthy baby with a full belly. Doesn’t matter how it happens. 

You are going to be fine. Everyone is terrified of the testing, terrified of how to deal when the baby comes. We live in a society (thanks so much, social media) that makes it seem like every pregnant lady should be vomiting joy around the clock. Pregnancy is hard work and you should take it easy on yourself. Be kind to yourself.

Post # 4
Member
345 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Tell your midwife and and tell them now. Depression in pregnancy is well known and easily treated. In the UK they will also put in extra support for you and keep and eye on you as you’re more at risk of pp depression too.

ITS OK TO FEEL LIKE THIS

there is help out there and you will love your baby. If fact it’s clear you already do otherwise you wouldn’t be worried about the scan. 

 

Post # 5
Member
1274 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Twizbe :  

Love this! I was on medication throughout my pregnancy and had a perfectly uncomplicated pregnancy and healthy baby.

Op, there is help out there <3

Post # 6
Member
265 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Also look into postpartum/pregnancy support groups. Where I live there is a group called baby blues network and they hold support group meetings. It was really helpful for those I know that struggled with mental health issues during pregnancy to have an in person support group.

Post # 8
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Take some deep breaths and try to calm down! Yes, it’s scary, but you’ve got a few months to get used to the idea. Definitely tell the midwife, hopefully she can get you whatever help is right to make this easier on you. 

I looked at your old posts and saw that you had some spotting and cramping? I hope that’s all gone away. That can really mess with your mind… I had the same thing happen with one of my kids and that entire pregnancy was so terrible. I was waiting for the other shoe to drop the whole time, and even after she was born it was a few months till I was able to bond with her. So awful, but it’s all passed and it’s only a bad memory. 

The work people with baby questions are the worst.  No advice there, I never figured out how to make it stop, but ugh it would be nice if they’d talk about anything else! 

And you don’t have to like anyone’s kids but your own! I  used to not even know what to say to little ones or how to hold them. If it doesn’t come naturally,  you still get to know what you’re doing with time, and can relax and enjoy the person they’re growing into.  

Post # 10
Member
2979 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

v123a :  I think you should see a therapist. I was on  ed rest for most of my pregnancy so at times those thoughts crawled into my head. Having a judgement free zone to let all of my frustrations and anxieties out is super beneficial.

Post # 11
Member
104 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

v123a :  Hugs!! Just wanted to let you know that you’re not alone. I’m going through the exact same thing – I’m also 32 years old, 10 weeks pregnant, and feeling ambivalent / anxious / depressed about the whole process (whereas my DH is over the moon). 

I’ve talked to my OBGYN, doula, and therapist about it and they’ve assured me that these feelings are very very normal. What’s helped me is admitting these feelings of ambivalence to my DH, my family, and a handful of close friends. While a few people were taken aback that I felt this way, it helped to know that I no longer needed to be “fake excited” around them.

Like other bees have said, take one day at a time. Feel free to PM me any time if you need to talk!

Post # 14
Member
2979 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

v123a :  if you can muster up the sppons/strength to fight it’s definitely worth it. But if you need someone to talk to I’m here I just cane out of a particularly rough pregnancy. And can tell you my mental health was fucked because I was on bed rest. So it’s linda different but I get what you’re feeling with not having mom thoughts. And just so you know it’s ok to have those kind of thoughts as long as you realize that it’s not you. Depression sometimes comes with pregnancy 

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