(Closed) Might have to push wedding back a few years.

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: What would you do?
    Hire a hotel and get married when you want to : (16 votes)
    50 %
    Hold out for a few years for a unique venue : (0 votes)
    Other : (1 votes)
    3 %
    Come up with something unique AND cheap! Ideas/Advice below! : (15 votes)
    47 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1888 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    @ZebraPrintMe:  I’m not going to suggest one way or the other, instead I’d offer a few factors to consider.  What does your FI think?  Are they willing to put things on hold for a few years?  It’s not a tough decision is a really sucky decision.  I’m in the same boat as you in that my first three ‘ideal’ venues are way out of range.  At that point I decided that I was so frustrated waiting to get married (we’ve been together for five years), that I was determined to find something that worked.  I’d always had my heart set on a Victorian country look.  Now about twenty venues later I’ve gone further afield (we’re an hour away from where we live because venues are alot cheaper), and found several sites we live by the beach.  You have a tough decision to make, but if I had to give you any advice: sometimes in not gettting what you always wanted you end up finding something better.  Wish you the best!

    Post # 4
    Member
    127 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @ZebraPrintMe:  hi. may i suggest that you talk to family and friends about your budget. thats what i did and ended up with alot of gifts that covered parts of the wedding. people where quite proud of what they had done for us ad were happy to be included in the wedding. for example my sister made my head piece and it was a surprise as i did not see it untill the wedding. my sister has now started a sideline in head pieces. one aunt made my cake. another made my flowers. my nephew sang in the church. my sister in law did my wedding favors. and my friends stood in and where my wedding photographers, dj, band and bagpipe player and hairdresser. this ment that i could have the wedding i wantedwith all my family and friends included 

    Post # 5
    Member
    498 posts
    Helper bee

    @ZebraPrintMe:   Money, argh, how we all wish we had more to spend on our weddings!  I am on my 2nd wedding plan to the most wonderful man, but we don’t have stacks of cash to splash.  We both love old stone buildings so I’m now investigating the idea of an evening wedding in a ruined stone building with 500 candles … now how cool will that look! We can bring our own wine/keg, get caterers in, will tell guests that it’s a cocktail evening rather than a sit-down dinner, and as the evening is shorter we will save on hours booked for photographer, etc.  It’s not just the venue that has to be different, if you go with a non-traditional time of day that also makes it out of the ordinary.  Think Sunday brunch or an afternoon High Tea etc with tiers of nibbles rather than a full meal.  High Tea can be classy!  Get friends or cheap uni students to hire tuxedos and serve the champagne. Although my first marriage sadly didn’t work out, we had the most wonderful wedding with a Sunday brunch under a marquee in the rainforst and so many people said it was the best wedding they’d ever been to – and it only cost us $2,900 including my dress. Wishing you the best of luck. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    7400 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    @ZebraPrintMe:  Unfortunately in the wedding industry unique normally = expensive.

    I think you need to write down what your vision is exactly and then pick out the main priorities of that vision. Then price out those priorities.

    For example if it is unique and intimate try and come up with outside of the box (and wedding industry) venues that might meet that. Is there a quaint village hall somewhere that you can turn into your favourite italian restaurant? Could you premake and freeze (could you hire a freezer for a month prior to your wedding or fill your friends/relatives freezers?) lasanga and then hire catering college students to heat and serve it for you with a salad?

    Or a field somewhere that you could have the wedding in and then a picnic reception (obviously going for summer here given you are in the UK)?

    2015 is a long way off so could both of you get a second job to make more money that is solely put aside for the wedding?

    Post # 8
    Member
    7400 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    @ZebraPrintMe:  That sucks about the tax on a second job. Here you lose about 50% which to me is worth it if you are saving for something that you really want (or are in financial distress).

    We saved for years for our wedding so I understand how frustrating it is.

     

    Post # 9
    Member
    573 posts
    Busy bee

    £9K for a restaurant? How does that work?  It it gourmet?  That’s a lot of money considering many stately homes are available for weddings for much less.  I hope you can come up with a solution that fits with your vision.  You can make it work, but as PPs say, it might involve having some thoughts outside the box.

    Post # 10
    Member
    405 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I second the village hall idea. We hired a big, lovely hall for three days and it was £500. Brought  caterers and all our own booze in, decorated it to our style and it worked really well. It is definitely more work than choosing a more normal wedding venue, but it can work out really nicely and cheaper.

    Post # 12
    Member
    573 posts
    Busy bee

    @ZebraPrintMe:  I’m sure there will be other restaurants that serve the food you love.  Then again, I have no idea yer about how much it would cost.  I too hope in the future to book out my favourite eaterie.

    Post # 13
    Member
    2355 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I don’t have any ideas for you, but I think it’s silly to wait years to get married so that you can have the wedding of your dreams. I would change your vision and find something that works. The marriage is more important than a party that lasts a few hours.

    Post # 15
    Member
    2355 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @ZebraPrintMe:  I am sure that you will still be able to throw some elements in that you really love; it just won’t be at the venues you were hoping for. Good luck! Someone mentioned village halls? I’m guessing in America that would be what we would call a community center. Those are usually a cheap route; it’ll just mean more DIY.

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