Might not be able to move in together right after marriage…Advice needed…

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I vote being in a cramped one bedroom is better than moving into a place you can’t afford, or not being able to live together after being married.

Post # 3
Member
2179 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2024

I’m sorry to hear you are going through tough times, and about the MS.

I understand a small 1 bedroom isn’t ideal for 2 people but maybe if one of you moved in with the other and put some stuff in storage or sold some things you can save the money of one of the apartments for a nice nest egg/downpayment on a bigger rental in the future. I know it’s not ideal but I wouldn’t want to not live with my SO.

If he’s supporting you both right now I’d pick the bigger apt of the two and deal with the smaller space until you have a good amount of money saved up to get a bigger rental.

Post # 5
Member
2126 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

sara_tiara:  +1

FI and I have always lived in a one bedroom. Is it sometimes cramped? Do we wish we had more space? Yes, of course, but it’s doable and it’s better than not living together at all. 

If a 1 bedroom is all you can afford, you can find a way to make it work for 2 people.

Post # 6
Member
954 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

BelleEtoile:  I agree with PP’s and live in the small cramped apartment. I’d rather live with my new husband than anything else.

Post # 7
Member
4639 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I don’t have experience with this but, my FI and I live in a 1 bedroom condo. The square footage is under 650. Its small but never feels cramped.

I’d take that over not living together, or spending outside my means to live in something bigger.

Post # 8
Member
9529 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m with everyone else – move into the larger of the two one bedroom apartments until you can afford to rent a larger house. Living separately would be both difficult on the relationship and more expensive than living together. 

Post # 9
Member
42469 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Many couples live in a one bedroom apartment. It would  be foolish to overextend yourselves financially when you have such recent experience with how your income can drop to virtually nothing overnight when you are self employed.

Post # 10
Member
2576 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

DH and I live in one of the most expensive parts of the country, hence we’ve had to live in a one bedroom apartment when we first moved in together. It was cramped, but it was a great litmus test for whether we were truly meant to be together. I was like, “If we can survive living in such cramped conditions, then we can survive anything as a couple!” Look at it from that standpoint. 🙂

We are currently living in a 2 bedroom apartment that is actually smaller/more cramped than our 1 bedroom was, but we are moving out in a couple months. If you consolidate and move into one apartment, just know that these living conditions will NOT be permanent.

Post # 11
Member
1082 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Before I met DH I bought myself a teeny tiny flat in Paris. I just converted it to square feet and it’s apparently 290, so not big, but for one person in a capital city it was great. 2 months after I moved in I got together with DH.

We didn’t officially live together until we were engaged in June 2012 but we spent well over a year living together while we planned and saved for the wedding/future. Sure, it was cramped and DH had to keep a lot of stuff in storage, but we we couldn’t wait to be together 24/7 and financially it was great for both of us. I say go for it.

Post # 12
Member
3097 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - A court...

I agree with PP, move in to the bigger apt, keep the nicer things each of you have (keep your dresser/ his tv etc). DH & I live in a one bedroom apt & with the right furniture not cramped at all. Though everyone’s situation is different, I’d rather live together after marriage. Hope you can figure something out *hugs*

Post # 13
Member
382 posts
Helper bee

BelleEtoile:  I’m sorry you are going through so much. It sounds like you and your FI have had a rough year and I congratulate both of you for handling it so well.

Like other bees have mentioned, I would be cramped in a one bedroom rather than not live together. My FI and I are actually living in a small one bedroom now to save. I have a storage unit with a lot of my stuff that wouldn’t fit in our home. I also found really good storage solutions and small space living ideas on Pinterest and Apartment Therapy. It can feel cramped at times but it works.

Post # 14
Member
1043 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

we have made one bedroom itty bitty apartment work for a couple years now  before we moved to that place  we lived in a single person 20 by 13 studio together for 6 months ( I dont know how that even worked & i dont think I could go back lolol)…but, it can be done… just really put effort into creative organization and ask parents if you can store extra not necessary items with them till you have room and save up …

Post # 15
Member
1878 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Valparaiso, IN

If my husband and I can manage living in a STUDIO apartment for possibly two years (going on 1.5 years mark) then you can manage to live in a one bedroom apt. Why do you guys need space anyway? You’ll be newlyweds. You’ll be fine. Honestly I would chose to be cramped in a one-bed apartment paying rent on one apartment rather than paying rent on two apartments. 

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