MIL told FI and I we MUST invite our bosses…

posted 2 years ago in Reception
Post # 2
Member
609 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

DH and did, but we both work for the same small company and we invited our immediate bosses our gm and the owner along with co-worker friends.

If you work for larger companies and arent particularly close with your bosses, I wouldnt worry about inviting them.

Post # 3
Member
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014 - 11/15/14-Vineyard

We both have close co-workers and our bosses coming. We figured it’s the people we spend the most amount of time with, we actually like these people and would hang out outside of work with some them. 

I don’t think it is a MUST but if you like them, I do think it would be a nice courtesy. If they are helping pay for it, you should. If you guys are paying for the wedding, then it’s up to you guys who you invite. Either way..not a MUST.

Post # 4
Member
42510 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Definitely not a must. I, for one, am a firm believer in separating my work and social life. I don’t socialize with these people. Why would I invite them to my wedding?

Think of it from their point of view. Unless they have a close friendship ith you, they could be inundated with wedding invitations and feel obligated to send a gift even if they decline.

Post # 5
Member
6747 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I don’t think its a must- but we both invited our bosses and they both came with their spouses. 

Post # 6
Member
716 posts
Busy bee

I don’t think it’s a must, but personally I plan to invite as I would rather welcome than insult.  You never know how your lack of invitation will be perceived.

 

Post # 7
Member
406 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Not a must. Might be awkward if you work closely with them, though.

Post # 8
Member
1532 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

No, this is not the norm.

This would make sense if you’re in a small business – like say a bakery – where everyone is like family and putting their all into it. This also makes sense if your parents are friends with your bosses somehow. Otherwise, no – this is not a normal thing.

That being said – if your parents are willing to pay for plates for these people – just let it happen. If not, it’s time to start learning to say “no” to these sorts of things. People have the weirdest ideas about weddings. The mother of one of my friends thought it was super rude that the parents of the bridal party were not invited to the wedding. Like – what planet do you live on where that happens?? 

Post # 9
Member
1691 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

LWatson1618:  My husband is a “boss” of a lot of people. He personally hates getting invited to weddings for people that he really has no relationship with outside of work just because people think they should invite the boss. As a result, he doesn’t attend any weddings because it would be too time consuming to go to all of them, an awkward to pick and choose. I think you you should invite bosses if you consider yourselves friends. Otherwise don’t bother.

Post # 10
Member
2791 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

No! I’m only inviting family and people we hang out with regularly. If I wouldn’t casually go out to dinner with you or see you on a holiday… not invited!

Post # 11
Member
744 posts
Busy bee

LWatson1618:  Absolutely not – and I really like my boss!  My reasons:

1. I don’t hang out with my boss socially outside of work

2. I don’t want my boss seeing me cry or otherwise get emotional (or drunk, or any other type of non-professional state I may be in)

3. He would know absolutely no one there; I can’t imagine he would have a good time.  And we don’t have the space or money to invite the other 9 people on my team plus spouses. 

Again, they’re all lovely people who I really enjoy spending the day with, but I feel strongly that our wedding is for family and personal friends only.

Post # 12
Member
210 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Its definately not a must but my husband works at a small company and invited everyone because hes close to them and has been there for a couple years now.  It ended up working to our advantage because his boss’ wife loved the wedding so much she ended up conving the boss to give him a raise! I on the other hand didnt invite anyone from work, only two past coworkers. If you dont normally hang out with your boss or you’re not to close to them then an invite wont be necessary. 

Post # 13
Member
6609 posts
Bee Keeper

You don’t have to, especially if it’s going to be a small wedding. Not everyone is close to their boss. 

Post # 14
Member
1062 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

If you’re not close to your boss, then I wouldn’t invite. And it’s not the norm to invite your boss either.

Post # 15
Member
2891 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

LWatson1618: Depends on your relationship with your boss. I hang out outside of work with my boss, so he’s definitely invited. But my previous boss? Even if I were still working for him, I would NOT invite him. He didn’t acknowledge my engagement, so I doubt he would have noticed if he didn’t make the list.

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