MIL wants me to invite more people, help

posted 2 years ago in Family
Post # 2
266 posts
Helper bee

Is she helping pay for the wedding? if so she should get some leeway, but if not I would just stick to my guns and to my guest list.

Post # 3
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

“Hey FMIL. Attached is the final guest list. We have all the addresses we need so everyting is now finalized!” 

If she responds with more names tell her that the list is already finalized. Also, having just 6 guests from your fmil is really low, even for only 74 guests and especially if they are helping you pay. 

Post # 4
4441 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

HammerBride:  I echo what everyone else has said – are Future In Laws helping you pay for the wedding?

Any telling her to back off needs to come from your FI if it comes to that point.

Post # 5
127 posts
Blushing bee

If you guys are the ones paying for everything then a way around this would be to tell her as you are already stressed for money it’s not feasible.  Another thing you could ask is that if she helps pay for some stuff (decorations, food, whatevery you decide) then the more the merrier but you can’t afford stuff for everyone.

Post # 7
3835 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

HammerBride:   Then draw the line – tell her your (as in YOUR) guest list has been finalized.  No apologies, just tell her firmly.   

Post # 8
2787 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

HammerBride:  I say go back to your Fi and tell him you changed your mind about your MILs’s friends. THIS IS NOT HER WEDDING!!! Honestly I don’t understand AT ALL why parents do this to their childrens weddings. If you were to invite more peope IT HA TO BE YOUR FRIeNDS….period. 

Your MIL should have a vow renewal and invite all the friends she wants if she wants to party with them. 

Set your foot down girl…this is YOUR wedding…and don’t worry about looking like bridezilla….you wont …and even if you do (you wont) it’s your wallet that will suffer for people that don’t really care or know you…..

So call your MIL up and tell her sorry you cant. Have her invite them to the shower if you want to soften the blow… (but make sure she invites them and you don’t ..) or even better have your mom host a party at her house for herself…and let her pay for their food….tell her to go out on a girls night and host her own friends…..

I am a firm believe that the only people who get to invite people to a wedding is the BRIDE and GROOM …no matter who pays for the wedding….

Post # 9
686 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Do not give in! Explain that you couldnt even invite all of your own friends, and you want your wedding to be an intimate day with people that know and love you and your husband. Strangers faces at a small wedding are unwelcome. 

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